One-Shot Week! Mrs. White has Conversations with a Stranger!

One shots… How I love them. You get in, read some awesome stuff—a little plotline, a little fluff, some angst, and a dash of lemony goodness—and you get out. Easy peezy, lemon squeezy. Sorry, too much time with the kids, it being summer and all. Seriously, when does school start? I thought we had a deal, I send the kids to school, the school takes them. It was working for me. Anyhow, I read something recently that got me all cheerful and happy, something that reminded me of the wonder of the holiday season, which is great considering it’s two hundred and seventy four degrees at my house right now.

Conversations with a Stranger is a lovely little one shot written by BittenBee for the Anything Goes Under the Mistletoe contest. I might be mistaken, but I think this little lovefest even won the contest. And why shouldn’t it? It’s incredible—like poetry. It just reminded me why I love BittenBee’s writing so much. She’s amazing. And I love her. So much. Well, maybe too much… I need to check into those restraining order laws again, every state is different.

Bella Swan, who has been away at school, is desperately trying to get home for the holidays. It’s not that she doesn’t want to go, it’s more that her mother is expecting her to, and the woman won’t take no for an answer. After making her travels plans at the very last minute, Bella is on her way, only to reach the airport and find out her flight to Portland has been cancelled. In a mad rush to please her mother and be on time, she books another flight to Seattle, hoping she’ll get there in time to catch a train to Forks. Plan sounds great, right? Wrong. Bella forgets to factor in the weather and snow that has all train lines closed down. What’s a girl to do? Enter Edward Cullen. He’s in the same boat as Bella, trying to get to Forks for Christmas with his parents and hitting road blocks at every turn. When he overhears Bella saying she’s going the same way he is, he offers for her to tag along with him in the rental car he’s getting. Afraid to face the wrath of Renee, Bella agrees, hoping that stranger Edward isn’t some kind of ax murdered. As they travel along together, she is pleasantly surprised at how great he is, and she actually dreads the end of their time together. What will happen when they get there? Will they have anything interesting to talk about during their drive? How will Charlie react to finding out that his baby girl willingly got into a car with a complete stranger? And do you really need mistletoe to kiss someone on Christmas?

Conversations with a Stranger is a wonderful story that is so descriptive, you can actually see yourself in the story, feel everything that’s happening to Bella. It’s written to perfection, just like all of BittenBee’s stories are. It’s no wonder it’s wonderful…it comes from one of the best authors out there, in my opinion. And we all know I’m always right. Don’t we? Have I steered you wrong yet? Nope, okay then. Give this story a shot. You’ll be glad you did, and it might even have you anxiously awaiting the arrival of Christmas, and maybe making your travel plans a little later than usual, in hopes of finding your own man to ride along with. I know I’m thinking about it…

**********

After hanging up, she turned to face Edward, trying to remember where their conversation had left off. Before Bella could open her mouth to speak, he veered off an exit that definitely wasn't in the direction to Forks. An icy ripple of fear laced up her spine for an instant. This was it, she thought—he was going to take her to a secluded area and chop up her body parts into small pieces. Why, oh why did she get into a car with a total stranger?

Hearing her quick breath, Edward looked at her with alarm. "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

Bella rearranged her expression, quickly composing herself. "This isn't toward Forks," she commented shakily.

"I need to stop off and get gas, is that okay? This shitty SUV guzzles it faster than I thought." He looked at her strangely just as a snowed-in gas station came into Bella's view. What was her fear? Did the phone call have something to do with her nervousness? Edward didn't understand, but let it go. He wasn't comfortable enough yet to start grilling Bella about her feelings.

She nodded vigorously, not trusting herself to speak just yet. The stress of traveling must have been weighing on her to even imagine such a ridiculously morbid scenario, she thought. After reassuring herself, the opportunity to see if the place had a restroom rose.

As Bella opened the car door, the frigid air tingled like a frosty mask fitting over her face, sealing her skin. With a small whine she hopped out into dirty slush covered in fresh snow just as Edward began working the nozzle.

"I'm going to look for a restroom."

"Maybe I should go with you," he offered, looking around.

Bella shook her head. "I'll be right back. If I'm still gone in ten minutes, you have my permission to break down doors," she joked half-heartedly.

One-Shot Week! Mrs. Peacock finds a Custom Built!

It has always been a dream of mine to take an old house that was in need of some love, gut it and make it my own. I’m pretty sure there is some sort of psychological symbolism in there somewhere, but for as long as I can remember that has been one of my aspirations. With her one-shot Custom Built, Ninjakitten3782 has taken my fantasy and made it better – she added Edward.

Bella is an accomplished author living in New York City. She thrives on the hustle and bustle around her and draws inspiration from the chaos and pulsating energy of The City. So imagine the shock when she finds out she inherits a cabin in rural Colorado. Oh, and 10 million dollars to fix it up. Nice problem to have, right? Suddenly NYC seems a little claustrophobic, maybe a little crowded. It is amazing what having options will do to one’s perspective. With no family ties and a portable job, she makes the decision to move. But first she has to fix up the cabin, and that’s where Edward comes in.

Edward Cullen is one third of the family based business EMC Construction, obviously located in Colorado. He has a carpentry background and an eye for design, so he handles the residential projects, leaving Emmett and Jasper to handle the commercial properties. When he talks to Bella over the phone about what she wants to do with the cabin he is immediately intrigued, especially when he learns that money is not an issue. It also doesn’t help that there is an immediate chemistry between the two. It’s like a match made in heaven.

"So…uh, sorry about the long winded story, but now I kind of have ten million dollars to renovate this place," I finished quickly.

He inhaled sharply and choked a bit. "Um…ten million? Uh… we'll be fine. I don't think we could hit that if we tried."

"Well I would. Like to try, that is."

"Try to hit ten million?"

"Well, maybe not ten million… but I want to spend as much money as I can on the renovations. He told me to use whatever was leftover to further my career, but I make a pretty good living for myself."

He was chuckling at this point, "If you need someone to help you spend the money, I'm your guy. I can find the most expensive everything out there. That is not going to be a problem."

"Thank you. But can you see why I didn't want to just go throwing out numbers over the phone?"

"Yeah. I totally get that now. I wouldn't have wanted to throw that number around either."

"Exactly," I said with a nod.

We spent about another hour going over his notes, adding things here and there. As soon as Edward felt confident with his 'feel for the project,' we locked up the cabin and made plans to meet the following morning at his office so that I could sign a contract. Back out by our cars, he shook my hand and opened my car door for me. I thanked him politely and then totally checked out his ass when he walked back toward his truck.

Mmmmm. Nice.

Over the next several months, the project takes off and things start to come together. Bella and Edward communicate frequently via email and phone, and suddenly it’s not just the cabin that is under construction; a relationship is developing as well. It is because of this connection that Edward starts to feel personally drawn to the project and sets out to surprise Bella. When she finds out what he did, her reaction is, ahem, inspiring.

"Christ… you are… so fucking sexy…" he growled as he kissed his way back up my neck. "You have… no idea… how much I want you right now."

One of his hands had moved up to cup my face. I slowly opened my eyes and turned toward him. When I saw the raw desire behind his gaze I knew exactly where this was going. "Edward… please…" I breathed as I brought my lips back to his.

But this time I didn't stop there. I used the leverage I had on his neck to pull him down on top of me as I lay back on the overstuffed sofa. He kept one arm wrapped around my body and his other hand moved down to my waist, playing with the hem of my shirt. His fingers briefly brushed the soft skin on my stomach and fire coursed through me. I moaned deeply into his mouth, which encouraged him to keep pushing my shirt up.

He seemed to come to his senses briefly before lifting it up all the way, looking down at me with a serious expression, "Are you sure about this? About me?"

"Yes… I want this," I managed to get out. "I want you." I hoped he could see the needy desire I felt… not just for his body, but for him.

I rarely read one-shots more than once, but this one has a spot on my list of go-tos when I need a quick fix. It is fun, fluffy, sexy and well deserving of its first place win in the Men at Work contest. Go read it, you won’t regret it.

One-Shot Week! Mean Mrs. Mustard finds some Stoli and Sexpenders!

Back in early June, a one shot showed up in my inbox and I was immediately intrigued and all it took was one non-existent word – Sexpenders. Stoli and Sexpenders

We all know what they are - suspenders that hang oh so lusciously off the back of pants worn by Rob himself - and many of us dream of them on a frequent basis, myself included (picture included!). Needless to say, I quickly pulled open the story and was surprised by what I found within… it was fucking awesome. In such a short story, TKegl has managed to make characters we are interested in, a romance we cheer for and some really hot sexing. What else do you need? No, really.

Edward and Bella, meet on the first day of college, running into each other in three classes on the first day of school and after some playful banter, they have been friends ever since. Of course, Bella has harbored some feelings for Edward, but she didn’t want to ruin their friendship. Edward is an art student who dressed rather quirkily, but Bella couldn’t help but fall for him.

I should have been able to control myself… to resist the urges I'd been ignoring since the first day I'd met Edward Cullen almost three years ago.

I should have… but then he wore those damned suspenders.

How could a girl resist that?

Edward always had his own style… as an Art major it was expected. One day he'd show up to class wearing a striped bowtie and sweater vest… the next a plaid flannel button-down and tie-dyed Converse. It was one of the things that made Edward, Edward… and one of the things that made him irresistible to me.

I find that when I read one shots, it’s hard to get inside the characters brain or to truly care for them, but TKegl manages to do just that. It’s not that she gives us a lot of history or background into the characters, because the reader really only sees them in the moment. Sure, we learn how they met, but everything is really in the present day for our favorite twosome. My favorite part of this one shot is that the UST (unresolved sexual tension) is there from the moment you start reading this story, so when things begin to heat up, in a library late at night, you can’t help but be excited.

I stuck my tongue out at him and bent to pick up a book. I lost my balance and reached out to stop my fall, grabbing onto the first thing I touched.

Of course, it was one of Edward's suspenders.

And it was enough to pull him over… and right on top of me.

"Unff," I grunted as I lost my breath, then I blinked as I took in Edward's piercing green gaze just inches from my face. I could feel his breath wafting across my face and his body… his whole body… along the length of mine.

If I died right that minute, I'd tell God to keep heaven because I'd found something better.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked, but he made no move to get up.

"Stupid sexpenders," I muttered.

"What?" Edward laughed. "Sexpenders?"

I shoved him off of me, reddening furiously. "I said 'suspenders'," I insisted, standing up and relieved I could do it without stumbling.

"No, you didn't," Edward countered, a wide grin on his face. "You said 'sexpenders'. Bella, do you think my suspenders are sexy?" he asked teasingly as he got up.

"Shut up," I growled.

He reached down and grabbed the lengths of stretchy fabric, toying with them and twisting them in his fingers as he walked toward me slowly. "Admit it. You like my suspenders. You love my suspenders."

Ungh. I love your sexpenders too!

Now, if you haven’t had a chance to check out this story, hop to it! It’s fucking awesome! After all, it has Stoli & Sexpenders. What’s not to love?

One-Shot Week! Mr. Green gets some Good Vibrations with 107yearoldvirgin!

Welcome to One Shot Week. As you all know, I’m not an angst lover, so today, I’m going to recommend you a story that you could read to brighten up your mood after you’ve read something that brings you down.

I’m sure most of you have heard of an author name 107yearoldvirgin. She is well known for her MannyWard in ‘Eight Days a Week’ and many other fics. She also is a part of the well known Southern Fanfic Review blog!

Today, I am going to talk about her unique one shot story called Good Vibrations. The story was first posted in the author compilation for MsKathy’s ‘TwiFans for Haiti’ project, where people in the fandom donated money to the Red Cross to help Haiti. Over 259 authors joined in the fundraising.

I instantly fell in love with this story because, well, it’s different. Not only that it is based on a person’s story, but it’s about a condition that I haven’t heard of before.

I love how it is so honest, and probably is closest to the real event. It makes you realize that there are disordered, diseases, things out there that you could never imagine to exist.

Here’s the summary: Edward Cullen hates blind dates. An arranged meeting with Bella Swan may just change his mind and open his eyes to a new, uncharted world of possibilities.

I guess I can say Edward is a bit of a manwhore.

You see, I overexerted most of the women I’ve dated in the past. I can go for hours and hours as well.

Yeah? Well, Bella Swan isn’t one of them because….

I have a disorder called PSAS.

Curious? Go check out the O/S. It’s fun, lemony and angst-less!

Luckily, I’ve gotten a chance to speak with the author, so check out what she has to say!

Mr. Green: Hello there, Amber.
107: Hi! *waves like a spaz*

Mr. Green: First of all, how did you discover FFn?
107: I discovered FFn because I was trolling around on IMDB one day, looking at Eclipse info, and there was a post with a link to The Office. My life has never been the same...

Mr. Green: Did you start to write right away?
107: It took me about a month to get the guts up to write. I never thought anyone would read what I was writing. I just wanted to get my story out of my head.

Mr. Green: Tell me about your story Good Vibrations. How did you come up with the idea?
107: Funny enough, I had a reader ask me to write a fic about the subject. I told her I would give her a One Shot, instead. At the same time, the Haiti relief compilation came to my attention, so I wrote it for that and submitted it.

Mr. Green: Will Good Vibrations ever be continued?
107: LOL - No. I have no idea how I could do a multi chap fic about...THAT.

Mr. Green: True. We can just keep reading about Edward falling for Bella, with lots of lemons. Hahahahah.
107: Right? Just lots and lots of smut for smut’s sake. I would probably have to buy videos and a membership to some sort of online porn site in order to come up with crazy new ways to turn those kids into pretzels in the sack. I mean, really, there are only SO many positions we can get these two in, right?

Mr. Green: I've noticed that you are a part of SFFR as well. What do you enjoy most about being on the team?
107: I REALLY love having other people to talk to who understand my sick Twilight obsession. What I am thankful for the most is the ability to spotlight really awesome authors who have great stories that aren’t getting half of the attention that they deserve. There are so many stories out there, and if you don’t have five hundred thousand million bajillion reviews, no one thinks it’s worth their time.

Mr. Green: What's your top 5 favorite fic?
107: Ooh...I really hate doing favorites because I don't ever want to downplay another author's awesomeness. I do love The Office because it was my first; Tropic of Virgo because it is ridiculously beautifully written; I'll Be Your Lover Too because it got me pregnant – no lie; and The Workshop because it was just SO different; Cullen, Unscripted because The Monkey makes me smile.

Mr. Green: *shocked* Who’s the author of I’ll Be Your Lover Too? LOL!
107: It’s by my number one favorite author: EdwardsBloodType. She is the reason I began writing.

Mr. Green: I already know you are a Team Edward. Do you support other team also?
107: I support Team Happiness. This, in my mind, means 'Whatever makes Rob Happy'. KWIM?

Mr. Green: Yep, *nodding*.
107: I want to see Rob happy. All the time. Like…really, really, REALLY happy. *stares off into space*

Mr. Green: Bhahahah. What did you think of Eclipse?
107: Honestly? It is my favorite Twi-film so far. There was so much to laugh at and shake my head at, but they stuck pretty close to the story line of the book. I wrote a blog about it, and most people thought the blog made it sound like I hated it, but I’m just a snarky bitch. I loved it. LOVED. IT.

Mr. Green: What do you think is the best thing about this fandom?
107: Our willingness to stand behind each other and support other writers and readers. I have never seen such a radical fan base. Seriously. I like to say that I don’t have fans, I have readers. But mostly, I have a pack of rabid bulldogs ready to fight with or for me at any given chance. It’s overwhelming how loyal people are here.

Mr. Green: Well said, Amber. I still can’t believe the fandom has raised more than $200,000 since November 2010. I mean, shit, that’s a lot of money.
107: I know! I’m wondering if anyone wants to raise money for another good cause? Like my mortgage payment? Just kidding. Maybe.

Mr. Green: Yeah, if I have that much money… I don’t even know what I would do with it. Favorite swear word?
107: ‘Shit’. It is just...universal, ya know? Plus, you can say it SO many ways. Just make sure you hit the 't' just right. LOVE IT. One of my friends says it in the most perfect way, and I just ask her to say it so I can giggle.

Mr. Green: I wish I was in the same room with you while you demonstrate how to say ‘shit’ properly LOL!
107: Funny story about that: I didn’t start cussing until I started writing FanFiction. I was raised to not cuss or drink or anything like that. Married my only boyfriend; made him wait two years to do the deed so that I was over 18 (19 to be exact); didn’t drink until I was 21… So, at the ripe old age of 29 I started letting the cuss words fly and now I can’t get it to stop. Maybe I need an intervention of some sort?

Mr. Green: No… You’re good where you are LOL! What's your favorite Pop-Tart?
107: Oh, dude. I have to go old school with this one. I friggin' LOVE the blueberry ones. Because they don't taste like blueberry...but they are still delicious. I over-microwaved a strawberry one yesterday and it kinda exploded…looked like blood. But it was delish!

Mr. Green: Man, I wish I owned a Pop-Tart store. I would try all of the flavors. *sigh* Then, I would probably die from super high lol.
107: You and me both. But…I have to say no to the scary looking ones. Banana Split? Really? Gag…

Mr. Green: Does it taste like one? From my research *pulling out notebook*, you’re not much of a tweeter, but rather a Facebooker? Any particular reason?
107: *sad sigh* Yes. I got invited to Twitter by Sandy on SFFR. Once I got there I felt really lame. Like…one of the loser kids in the cafeteria spying on the cool kids having a convo. It took me forever to figure out how to even find the tweets directed at me. Truth be told, it made me feel like I was old and had no friends.

The Book of Faces, on the other hand, lets me get to know people on a personal level. We exchange pictures and stories, have snarky threads and create these really amazing relationships that I don’t think I could have achieved on Twitter. These women encourage me more than most people that I know in Real Life. And some of them have become close friends that make my life better on a daily basis.

Plus, the friendships that have developed between some of the women that joined FB just to have fun with me, have been awe inspiring. The FB-Twi girls have started meeting in real life and we send cards or presents; support; phone calls and general sweet support.

Can you tell how much I LOVE FaceBook???

Mr. Green: That’s awesome. I have sent some postcards from various places to some of the girls I’ve met in the fandom actually.
107: Umm…I love post cards. Just sayin’.

Mr. Green: Does music plays a big part when you’re writing?
107: Music is love, bb. I know people say all the time that their life is music, and I’m going to be cliché and say that I fall into that cheesy category. If there is no music, there is no writing. I can’t write in silence. And if I can’t find the right soundtrack to a chapter, I will get Writer’s Block like crazy.

Every new story has a new soundtrack. And if I am using a particular song in a chapter, I will listen to it on repeat until the chapter is done so I can get the timing right and keep the tone throughout the piece.

My husband is a drummer and I sing, and apparently our son is all kinds of crazy about music, too. He’s not even 2 and he can repeat perfect notes and such. Mommy’s hoping he’s a genius and will make money so she can retire and write FanFic for free until it becomes uncool.

Mr. Green: Maybe, who knows, right?
107: *crosses fingers*

Mr. Green: The other day, I just realized what your username really means. 107 year old virgin = Edward. God, I actually yelled out, “oh my fucking god. It’s Edward,” and then started laughing my ass off. Thank god I was alone, or else, I would have been submitted to a mental institute or something.
107: Ha! You are not the first person to say this. In fact, I went ahead and put it on my profile just in case other people were unaware – lol And it irritates me to NO END when people say he’s 109 year old virgin just because the movies came out later…GAH.

Mr. Green: Is there a celeb that you would turn gay for? (Weird question? Stole that off Rove – Australian TV presenter)
107: Hmm. I have a thing about other Vicki’s: They aren’t my cup o’ tea. But I have always told Hubward that if he is ever gonna cheat on me; it had better be with someone I could look at and say, “Yeah. I get that.” When we were younger and other girls would try to break us up I would get pissed if I thought they were uglier than me. Which is saying a lot, given my history of physical appearance insecurity. I told him when we got married, “Find a girl I wanna have sex with and I’ll let you do her.” He rolled his eyes and said, “You’d never want to do that…” He’s probably right, but I think Heidi Klum, Kate Beckinsale or Ellen Page would make me think twice.

Mr. Green: Hell yeah. Good choice.
107: *offers fist bump*

Mr. Green: Lastly, I know you’re on a break, but are we expected to see you soon?
107: *shakes head at my own lameness* Yeah, about that. The break kinda didn’t work out for me. I had gotten to the point after Decoy where I was worn out emotionally and was being beaten down by some people’s opinions. I had put too much of myself into the story and it was affecting me personally. I announced my break and a few days later had a list of eight new stories and one shots to work on. I took my time on a few of them and have actually just started posting again.

Bad News Bella is on FFN.

Heat of a Blue Flame is on FaceBook.

I’m keeping the Fluff on FFN, because it doesn’t hurt as bad for someone to hate the Funny. But, I have another story in the works that I am only posting on FaceBook so that I can see who is reading it and get feedback from them. It’s a different direction for my writing and I’m very proud of it, but massively protective as well. I’m not ready to let the wolves rip it apart, so I am keeping it safe.

My PocketEdward guards it with his very life.

Mr. Green: The wolves? Over on FFn?? Tell us a bit about ‘Heat of a Blue Flame’.

107: Yeah, I was getting some real flack for Decoy on FFN. While the majority of readers were really sweet and supportive, there were a handful of people that made things hard for me. Decoy was intensely personal on a lot of levels, and I got worn down by the constant barrage of negativity. So I took the break and decided that I wasn’t going to write anything based on my own experiences anymore.

Heat of a Blue Flame was one of the stories I had mapped out a bit over the first week I was ‘off’. I was enthralled by the blue fires at La Push. It got me thinking about how I could incorporate that flame…

I started out writing mystery stories when I was younger (I was more into RL Stein than Sweet Valley, if you get my drift). So, I just started typing, letting the story take me where it needed to go. After chapter 2, I waited for Edward to tell me his narrative. Once he let me know what had happed to him when he was younger, I developed Bella’s back story and have certain scenes in between that must be accomplished before the end is revealed.

It’s a journey for two broken souls who feel nothing at all to find exactly what they need in each other…

Mr. Green: Thank you for your time, Amber. *hugs*

107: Squishy hugs to you, bb! Thank you SO much for doing this. I’m beyond honored and flattered that you’d want to interview me. Mwah!

Wishing a Happy Birthday to the one and only Coldplaywhore!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COLDPLAYWHORE!!!!!

Dear Lynn,

First and foremost – HAPPY FRIGGING BIRTHDAY!! How old are you now, like 100? Anywho, I just wanted to wish my first real TwiFandom friend an amazing day. I’ll admit it – I completely stalked you at first, but who knew that when you were receiving all those crazy PM’s over on FFn last year that we’d be co-authors? You’re a wonderful friend and I don’t know what I’d do around here without you.

Love your partner in smut (aka First Real Stalker),

Nicole

Dear Coldplaywhore,

I hope you have a truly amazing birthday! I’m sorry for my lack of creativity, but I wanted to let you know that I love you dearly and I’m wishing you the best today!

Love,
Jen (GreenEyedGirl17)

Coldplaywhore-

Happy Birthday! I was so excited to be asked to take part in your bday celebration. September 1, 2009 was the day that I found your amazing stories (I know this bc its when I added you to my favs!), and I’ve been hooked ever since. Any review that was sent was answered, and as a reader it meant so much to me that you would take even more time out of your life to respond and answer any questions. The support you’ve given me since I’ve been writing amazes me and I will be forever thankful. I know I still totally fangirl on you still, and I’m afraid you’re just going to have to get used to it. You’re one of a kind, CPW, and I am so very lucky to have the opportunity to know you and call you friend. We are friends right? Maybe I should have asked that before all of this went down. Shit. Oh well, since you reviewed Dear Bella, I thought it fitting to give you a sneak peek into their lives a few years down the road. Some nice fluff because know you love it.

Love you,

Wonderslut 

xoxoxo

P.S. We are so doing that super hero piece one day!

Dear Bella: The Birthday (Future-Take)

September 13

BPOV

If I wasn’t already awake, the giggling surely would have done it. They were never able to be quiet, so this wasn’t really a surprise. What was a surprise, was the delicious smell that was accompanying them. Since all I heard was the giggling, I wasn’t expecting getting pounced on.
 

“Happy Birthday Momma!” my babies shouted while jumping on the bed.
 

I opened my eyes and put on the most shocked face I could. I looked over at my husband and he gave me a wink. He was holding a tray with what appeared to be breakfast.
 

“Oh, thank you my sweeties!” I said as they attacked me with sweet kisses.
 

It had been six years since Edward and I had first met in New York. Fours years since we made it official and I became his wife. Thirty-six months since I became a mother for the first and second time. And twenty-one months since I became a mother for the third time.
 

As our girls, Amelia and Emma, bounced around me, their little brother, Alex, was trying to climb up on the bed. Edward put the tray he was holding down on the night table next to me and lifted our son onto the bed. Alex grabbed my cheeks in his pudgy little fingers and gave me a big kiss with his chocolate covered lips. He let out a big smacking noise just like his Daddy did when he kissed his daughters and smiled at me.
 

“Happy Birfday, Momma!” he shouted.
 

“Thank you little man. How come you have chocolate all over your face?”
 

“We made you pancakes,” Emma told me.
 

“What kind?” I asked my little girl.
 

“Chocolate!” Amelia told me.
 

“Mmmm, those are my favorite.”
 

“That’s what Daddy said,” they said.
 

“Ok rugrats, let your Momma enjoy her birthday breakfast,” Edward told them.
 

They gathered next to me, sitting on Edward’s side of the bed, while he placed the tray over my lap. It was filled with way more food than I’d be able to eat. Besides the pancakes, there were scrambled eggs, Lucky Charms, Cheerios, orange juice, coffee and chocolate milk. I looked at Edward and raised my eyebrow. His sly smile told me that the kids had picked out the menu more for them than for me.
 

“This looks delicious babies. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to eat all of it though. Would you help me?”
 

That was all I needed to say, six hands descended on the tray and my breakfast was over in five minutes. Edward sent them off to watch some T.V. and got back into bed with me.
 

“Happy Birthday, baby,” he said, wrapping his arms around me.
 

I leaned my head towards his so that I could properly kiss him. As soon as our lips touched, I opened my mouth to him. His tongue was warm as it gently massaged mine and his hold on me tightened. The feeling of his erection against my stomach spurred my need for him and I felt my panties dampen with the need I had for him. Edward rolled me on my back and now he was positioned exactly where I wanted him. Except we were fully clothed and had three children down the hall from us. He rocked his pelvis into mine and I gasped at the sensation. After all these years together, he could still reduce me to a quivering mess. I bucked my hips into him that was all it took for us to be writhing against each other like teenagers.
 

When his hand touched my wet sex, I purred. Taking that as confirmation that I was enjoying myself, my husband slipped his fingers into my panties and stroked my slick folds until I was panting.
 

“Edward…please,” was all I could manage to say. I needed to come. Badly.
 

He buried two fingers inside of me and began to pump vigorously. I was so close to the edge, one little push was all it would take until I went over. His thumb touched my clit and when he pressed down on it, I almost screamed as I was wracked with the tremors of my orgasm. Edward’s mouth was on mine in that instant, swallowing the sounds of my pleasure.
 

“Fuck, Bella, I’ll never get tired of seeing you like this,” he said, as he pulled his fingers out of my panties. Looking me in the eye, he opened his mouth and his fingers disappeared inside.
 

“Still delicious,” he said, after sucking my juices from his fingers.
 

“That was the best birthday present ever,” I said.
 

“Oh, love. That’s hardly your birthday. Think of that as the appetizer to the feast we’ll be having tonight.”
 

“Feast?” I asked, my body responding again to just the thought of the possibilities.
 

“Yes. My mom is going to watch the kids and we’re spending the night out.”
 

“That sounds amazing. Now get on your back so I can thank you properly.”
 

“Yes, Mrs. Cullen,” he said, lying down next to me.
 

I straddled his hips, going for right his hard cock. Hey, when you had kids, sometimes foreplay didn’t happen. He moaned as I began to stroke him from base to tip, and I remembered the first time we had touched each other like this. Thinking about that was such a turn on that I picked up my pace wanting to feel him come.
 

“Edward, do you remember when we were in Chicago and I told you I wanted to feel you come on me?”

“Unghhh, yes baby, I remember. It was the hottest thing anyone had ever said to me.”

“Well, it’s my birthday, and I want that again,” I told him as I continued to pump him with my hand.

I knew when he was close, his breathing became erratic and the thrusts of his hips quickened. It wouldn’t be long before he orgasmed.

“Bella, I’m so close. Faster, plea…”

“MOMMA!” came a scream from the girl’s bedroom accompanied by a small crash.

“Sorry Mr. Cullen, duty calls,” I said as I hopped off the bed and walked toward our door.

“That is so not fair!” Edward whined.
“That’s parenthood buddy. Besides it’s my birthday, I got mine,” I winked at him and left him pouting in our bed.

Happy Birthday CPW!

I tried to think of something smutty to write, but that’s not me. Besides, it would have been just a little bit wrong to get you to beta something I was writing for your birthday. I thought about a banner or a picture, but you know how my PC hates me. I tried for weeks to come up with something that was perfect…but I just started to stress over it. You know me ;)

So I thought it over and figured I’d post the first chapter of The Ballad of Love and Hate today for your birthday. If it weren’t for you, I would have never had the courage to write it. If it weren’t for you, I would have done everything in my power to avoid it. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t believe that I could do it.

So Happy Birthday to my bestie. You make me brave.

Love,
Risbee

* and yes, I do realize that this means you did in fact beta something I was writing for your birthday…hope you forgive me :P

There once was a coldplaywhore,

her stories were never a bore.

Her lemons were smokin'

Edward's cock got a'strokin'

and he never left his Bella sore.

This whore went by more than one name,

though her snark, it was always the same.

Her brains were desired

her beta skills admired

and our love for her'll never be tame.

So this whore has a birthday today,

and so many have nice things to say.

We all want to kiss her

to grab her and wish her

a wonderful, happy birthday!


My uberbeta...what can I even say that will adequately express my feelings for you? There's not much, other than if I could wrangle Robert Pattinson and Michael Vartan into a room with me, and fill it with sex toys, you'd be the first person I would call. You know that's love, because my feelings for those two men could probably be classified as illegal in some countries. I'm just glad you feel the same way about them. :)

Thank you for being such a wonderful beta, a caring friend, an inspiring mentor, and a tough as nails lady who isn't afraid to subject her sweet little daughter to the wild, and possibly rabid, squirrels of the world. I'd be lost without you, and I absolutely wouldn't have had half the fun I've had over the past year without your encouragement. I think one of the best things ever to happen to me was when Our Ave's told me about a little story called Love Will Come Through, and I reviewed it. It was love at first sight for me, both with the story and with you. Thank you for writing me back, even if it was just in hopes that I'd actually come through with the cookie offers. One of these days... :D

I love you dearly, sweet cheeks, and I hope you have a wonderful birthday!!!

Oh, and no, they are not gassy. They are never gassy. Though I might have to throw that in one time...just for you. :)

Brandi
(beegurl13)

To Lynn,

Happy birthday. *hugs*

It has been an honor getting to know you. I fell in love with your stories, before started to stalk you on twitter LOL. Somehow, I got to travel to some places you’ve included in your American series, and that made the trip even more special. (Seriously!) I was so tempted to add a lock to a place where lovers do as a sign to express their ‘everlasting’ love or something, and write ‘Coldplaywhore’s Bella and Edward’ on it. However, I didn’t because well, I know for one that my mother would instantly think I have a boyfriend whom she doesn’t know of called Edward. *sigh*

You have introduced me to new music from artists like Coldplay and Joshua Radin. I really adore your music taste! I love talking to you on Gchat about random things. I trust in your comments about my story, and I believe I’ve learnt so much about writing from you in the past three months. I know you’re very busy, and therefore, thank you for helping me.

You’re a talented author, and I just love all of your stories.

I hope you will have a great day with your family. *hugs*

Love,

Nat

Happy 18th Birthday, Lynn... again! 

I hope your birthday is restful, happy, and full of as much excitement as you want there to be. 

~Keira (MaitresseSaint)

Dear Lynn (Coldplaywhore)

Okay, I've known about this for a while. I tried to come up with something witty, didn't work.

I tried to do a poem, it didn't rhyme.

I tried to do a banner but the colors just didn't come out right.

But then I remembered that all of that didn't matter. It didn't matter because if I would have done any of those things it would have all been coming from the same place, my heart.

No matter what I did it would still express how important and amazing you are.

When I first joined the twitter world and the Twilight Fandom, you were one of the first and only people I knew. You were kind and took me into the fold as your own. I still remember the weekend I came down with an ear infection and was bed ridden for days. But the only thing I did was sleep and read your stories. I still think that's why I got better so quickly.

You're an amazing writer, mother, and friend. You are always there to lend a helping hand. And I can attest to you bailing me out more than a few times. ;) But no matter what you'll always be just Lynn, just an amazing woman. And I'm proud to call you my friend.

Now with the sappy said, I was going to do my own rendition of the Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back rap but I don't think anyone can do it just like Jay. So here is the man himself. 

And if that isn't enough, you can rock out with Jay to Morris Day and the Motherfucking TIME!!

Happy Birthday Lynn! Love you Always!

One-Shot Week! Mr. Boody learns some Boardroom Policies by Kitty Cullen-03 and BamaBabe!

Good morning, afternoon, or evening ladies and gents. Thank you for joining us for one shot week here at P.I.C.

Today I have a fun, smutty, one shot to recommend. It’s Boardroom Policies by Kitty Cullen-03 and BamaBabe. This was written for The Love of Jasper o/s contest and was one of my top three favorites in the bunch.

This o/s is a Jasper/Bella. In the story Jasper is a business man. Bella is working with his company, but actually works for a different company. Her boss thinks the experience will be good for her, so in the beginning of this she’s been working with Jasper, over the phone, for months. She is flown in to work on some plans for Jasper’s company as this one shot starts out and immediately sparks begin to fly between these two. I heard that one author wrote one POV and the other wrote the other, but you can’t tell at all. The story flows so well.

"Thigh-highs and no panties, Darlin? You're a bad one, huh?" She moaned and nodded. I spun her around and walked her to the windows. She moved her arms around my neck, which pushed her ass against my cock and her breasts jutted out. Her breasts were supreme and her nipples perfect, tight rosebuds as I rolled them with my fingers. When we got to the window, I put both her arms over her head, palms flat against the wall. With my foot, I pushed her legs apart.

"Spread for me so I can worship your body properly." She shuddered again at my words and rolled her head back, making her hair cascade down over her ass. I stepped back to take in the whole sight of Bella. Her hair was messy and tangled from my fingers, her skirt was bunched around her hips and the stockings were starting to roll down her thighs. She was delicious and I wanted to take my time showing her just how delicious. I moved back to her and kneeled so I could remove her shoes and stockings. I rubbed her leg and foot on one side before moving to the other, reveling in the sounds of her panting and moaning at my touch.

Unf! Is all I can even say. The lemon was extremely well written, as was the story. These two ladies are both well known in the Jasper community for their amazing stories. Even if you aren’t a Jasper fan, please stop by and check out this amazing o/s. The length was perfect (at least for me) at 9,198 words and as I stated before, although this was a collaboration the flow was beautiful. Minimal grammar mishaps, which unfortunately, even with the best beta’s we all have them.

I would love to see this continued, though, I’m sure with two authors the convincing would be a little harder.

As always, please read and review.

Thank you for coming by. I hope you will stop by the rest of the week to see what the rest of us have in store.

Until next week,

Mr. Boody

Mean Mrs. Mustard gets ready For the Summer with Camoozle!

Viva La Prologue!

If you are on Twitter, you may have seen those three words repeatedly over the past several weeks. Those words intrigued me enough that I had to start reading For the Summer by Camoozle because I needed to know what all the fuss was about. Of course, I immediately became hooked. Then I hooked two friends, who hooked two more friends and now we’re all one big clusterfuck of people who live for Fridays when FTS updates. Some days I feel like a drug dealer as I tell my friends to read this story, they won’t regret it and they will thank me for it later. Anyways, before I start yammering on about all the weird things I did while on acid back in college, let’s move onto the story shall we?

To put it simply, For the Summer is the story of the summers Bella and Edward spend together. However, it is so much more than that. Bella’s father, Charlie, owns a small waterfront resort on a lake in Arizona. There’s a marina, you can rent sea-doos (Thanks Emmett) but there are also cabins, motor homes and all sorts of fun times can, and do, happen on that lake. Each summer, starting when Edward is 12 and Bella is 11, he comes with his family, which changes over the years to include his stepmother Esme and stepsisters Alice & Rosalie. Edward is from Seattle and his family comes to Arizona to relax and enjoy the summer. Carlisle writes his medical books while Bella and Edward are best friends and spend as much time as they can together.

Their friendship is easy at first, like peas and carrots, because they get along so well and age and gender aren’t really an issue. Of course, as they age things tend to get a little more complicated. Bella is unsure of herself and how Edward feels about her, even though her feelings are growing quickly and she find herself falling for him. He’s persistent, but never completely open with her either. Edward gives her gifts, each one an expression of how he feels about her, but he never comes out and says it.

Each chapter represents a new summer and each summer finds their relationship growing more difficult and complex. Edward’s life begins to change and he brings friends along for the ride some years, while Bella yearns to spend all of her time with just him.

Edward's quiet for a full minute and I'm afraid to look. I feel the bed move, and his body cuddles up to mine. His fingers gently wrap around my wrists and he tugs at my hands.

"Bella, come on, look at me," Edward asks quietly, and I allow him to pull my hands away from my face. "It's okay, you know. To be turned on. It's not bad or anything. And you can trust me. I don't want you to ever feel weird around me. I won't ever make you do anything you don't want to do."

"It's not that I don't want to. I've just never…done that. I've never felt these things before." I try to explain. I want to let him know it's not his fault in any way.

"Never? You've never been turned on?" Edward asks and I frown, embarrassment just won't leave me alone today. Oh well, since we're spilling secrets.

"Top Gun," I say quickly and Edward grins. "That part when they kiss and then there's the licking and yeah, that was pretty hot. I had to watch it sitting next to my brother and my mom. I couldn't even enjoy it properly."

"I really like you, Bella," Edward says with a soft sincerity that makes my chest swell. He swallows, his eyes on our hands connected between us.

"I like you too," I respond. "You're my best friend."

"Friend?" Edward asks, his eyes flash to mine at the word and I know I want him to be more. So much more.

But he can't be. He can't be anything to me because this isn't real life. The real Edward plays the piano and basketball and wears polo shirts. The real Edward lives in Seattle, Washington and takes advanced classes and hangs out with friends.

This is just a vacation. This is all I can have of him. For two months out of the year, Edward can be more than just my friend. For the next two months, Edward can be mine.

The usual cast of characters is there, with the canon counterparts, but the way Camoozle works other characters in is also one of the reasons I like the story. There’s the usual miscommunication, the UST and the awesome twists that you don’t expect, and everything makes for an awesome story that I can’t put down.

After all, as Shakespeare wrote - the course of true love never did run smoothly. But then again, isn’t that one of the reasons we read fic?

 

MMM: How did you get started with FF, both reading and writing? 

Cam: One of my good friends linked me Wide Awake after we read the books. After that, I read anything and everything until I started writing. Now, I’m very choosy because I just don’t have the time.

I started writing as an outlet. I was at a place in my life where I felt very limited and stuck. Writing helped to loosen things a bit.

MMM: What inspired you to write ‘For the Summer’?

Cam: There’s a Death Cab song, Summer Skin, and every time I hear it, I think of these river trips that I used to go on every summer with my best friend and his family. We used to make up these stories about the people that live in the small town that we’d drive through on the way in to the marina. A lot of the things that happen in the story are autobiographical. The boat in my banner is his boat and the resort in the background is where we stay. I’m making him read the story, lol!

MMM: As a member of Team Summerward, how did you feel when you found out that the team raised a collective $2,650 for FGB? 

Cam: This is just astounding to me. It’s quite remarkable that people are willing to give in so many ways. I’m looking for a way to somehow take credit for this, but I really can’t. It’s a beautiful thing, man.

MMM: I have to admit, I would love to see ANY chapter from FTS in EPOV, but is there anything in particular you want to write in EPOV for Team Summerward? 

Cam: Anything in Seattle. Anything that has to do with him interacting with his dad, anything about the world he lives in most of the time. This is elemental to the story, how Edward is such an island in Seattle. He’s pretty, and dreamlike but surrounded by water and detached from anything else.

MMM: Are you shocked by the response the story is getting? 

Cam: Utterly. I had no plans what-so-ever for people to like this. This story is purely self-indulgent, lol! I wanted to experiment with characterizations and voice and tense and plot devices. I really didn’t expect people to read it. Lol. But I’m so very humbled that they do. I’ve got nothing but love for these readers. They put up with my antics and I love them for it.

MMM: Most stories that feature a prologue have it be from the major drama that will unfold further in the story, however yours is very promising. Should this scare me? Is there heartache after we come to the prologue portion of the story or is the prologue the end?

Cam: The prologue and epilogue take place on the same day. No surprises. This story has a happy ending. It’s more the middle that’s important.

MMM: What’s the best review you ever got for For the Summer? Feel free to restate any of mine. Just Kidding. 

Cam: The best reviews are the ones where people relate or share their own summer stories. I love thinking that something I’ve written is relatable or realistic. It makes the experience just a little more personal. I like that.

MMM: When you started writing fan fic, were you ever discouraged about it? Maybe worried that people wouldn't like your writing? If so, what did you think about it? 

Cam: I’m discouraged all the time, but then I look at a sad Keanu and I laugh, lol. I read one a lovely review and my heart flutters. Sometimes I freak out and flail all over the place and my girls call me a goose and then I laugh at myself. And I know, I am absolutely positive that some people will not like my writing. No likey, no biggie…not every story is for everyone.

MMM: What advice would you give to a newbie wanting to write fan fiction? 

Cam: You’re not going to make everyone happy so write what you want and don’t read the forums, lol. I write way ahead so that by the time I’m posting the stuff that’s tough, it’s so far out of my mind that the writing isn’t effected by any negative response. And there will be negative responses and it’s okay. I pick one friend and write the story for them, like a gift. Then the negativity doesn’t matter as much.

MMM: What are some things you tend to steer away from when writing a story? 

Cam: It depends on the story, different stories tackle different issues. As far as actual writing goes, for this story, I wanted minimal filler, minimal prose. I wanted to write more dialogue. This is so hard for me, because I’m a wordy SOB.

MMM: What are your top 5 favorite FF’s you’ve read?

Cam: In no particular order…and they’re all complete.
Atlas Shrugged
Masque of the Red Death
Suicide King (although I think this was taken off FFN and is being edited. I just went to check and it only has two chapters up right now.)
When We Drove All Night
How to Save a Life

MMM: What stories do you recommend for our readers?

Cam: Read Disappear Here. Now.

MMM: What do you HAVE to read the moment you see an update?

Cam: See above. I can’t say enough about how much I adore this story/author/writing.

MMM: Have you ever had any surreal moments in fic? Times where you wondered what the hell you were doing, or shocked that something happened?

Cam: When I was reading How to Save a Life, there was a convo about Wuthering Heights that I swear is verbatim a discussion I’ve had with my best gal. Freaked me the fuck out.

Also, I had a reader when I was writing aCitD whose real life was eerily similar to the story. It’s such a trip to meet these people that are so far from me, yet so close in that they identify with my brain and my realities. It really does my head in.

MMM: If you had to mismatch the canon pairings who would you put with who and why?

Cam: I’m really liking the Emmett/Bella dynamic and also Emmett/Alice. I’m going through an Emmett phase, I think…lol.

I want an Alice/Jane fic. I think someone should write this for the In the Closet Slash Contest that I’m judging. WRITE MORE FEMMESLASH FANDOM. That is all.

MMM: And which pairings drive you crazy and why?

Cam: Anyone with Jacob makes me cringe. I despise him.

MMM: What is your craziest fan encounter or review?

Cam: In Constant, Bella has an eating disorder and after it was through, I had a reader PM me and tell me she was now getting help for her own eating disorder and I was completely floored. I have struggled with ED’s and wrote this story as a way to release some of my own harbored guilt. To know that someone else can benefit from my experiences means a lot to me. I think this is crazy, that something I’ve written is useful/meaningful/inspirational to someone else. It makes me feel kind of useful.

MMM: If you could beat the shit out of one Twilight character, from the book or movie, who would it be? How would you do it and why?

Cam: Jacob. I hate Jacob. I find his characterization completely manipulative and self-serving.

MMM: What is your favorite curse word?

Cam: Fuck. I love this word. I use it excessively. I’m like Sam I am with this word. I will use it in a house. I will use it with a mouse. I will use this word I say. I will use it every day.

MMM: If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

Cam: First of all, I’m going to be very surprised if I get into heaven. I don’t think my kind are allowed there.

And, if God himself meets me at the Pearly Gates, I’m gonna throw a hissy fit. There’s shit out there he should be fixing dammit! He shouldn’t be wasting his time with silly old me.

Professor Plum is All Aboard with TKegl!

So, a few months ago, word about the “Fun With Your Clothes On Contest” started buzzing around on twitter, and I simply could not resist checking it out. Cause, ya know I can’t pass up a good dry hump! TKegl’s one-shot, “All Aboard” was the first entry that I read, and after reading the rest of the entries, it was by far the best. Which is also probably why it won first place in the contest, including Judge’s Choice.

Here is FF’s summary: WINNER in the Fun With Your Clothes On Contest! Bella feels like a stalker, watching the hot guy who sits across from her on the train every night. But when she finds out he's watching back, sparks will fly. Riding the rails has never been so fun!

Here is my take on this fun shorty: Bella is a simple, hard-working college student, who just happens to enjoy staring at the guy who rides the same link from her apartment in downtown Seattle to the UW campus every night. Now, we’ve all had those moments, right? There’s always that one guy who we just cannot stop staring at, and then we need tissues for the trail of drool we’re leaving on our chins. Don’t deny it, you know you’ve done it!

She takes comfort in hiding behind her stalker sunglasses, and a magazine that she uses for extra cover. That is, until the day Edward gets on the train wearing sunglasses as well, because he’s been staring back at her. What will happen when the heat between them is so intense, that they can’t wait until they’re off the train to release it? What happens when they don’t even have time to take off their clothes?

On the train, I sat as far from him as possible while still keeping him in sight, donning dark glasses and holding a magazine up like I was reading it.

It was very James Bond.

Well, okay, more like Chuck Bartowski.

If Chuck was a girl.

And worked at a Starbucks instead of the Buy More.

Edward cast a curious glance my way the first time I used my avoidance disguise, but I refused to indicate I saw him at all. He frowned slightly, his eyes flickering to me occasionally until I stood to get off the train. He moved forward on his seat and opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but I hurried through the door, pretending I hadn't noticed.

The next day, he started wearing sunglasses as well.

Weird.

Of course, like I was one to talk.

So we'd sit on the rocking train every evening and I would stare at him through my dark glasses and over my magazine. Then, with a silent sigh I'd stand and walk to the door, watching him in the reflection in the glass until the doors opened and I'd step out onto the platform.

It was a strange relationship, but it worked. Sort of.

Until I let my guard down.

It was a Friday and the girl sitting two chairs down (I always set my backpack on the chair next to me so no one could see my stalker-y Edward sketches) asked if she could borrow my notes from the day before. Unfortunately, said notes were lovingly decorated by said sketches along the margins, so I couldn't really give them to her and maintain my amateur stalking status.

They'd definitely qualify me for the pros.

Instead, I offered to e-mail them to her and I sat, my foot tapping impatiently, as she wrote her name and e-mail address on a scrap of paper. Edward picked up his backpack and turned to walk out of the auditorium, so I ducked down to tuck the note into my bag. When I emerged from beneath my desk, he was gone.

I let out a breath of relief and gathered my things, rushing out the door…

…and right into Edward's chest.

His broad, firm… and extremely nice-smelling chest.

I might have sniffed him a little.

"Whoa…" He smiled, grabbing my shoulders to steady me. "Are you all right?"

I stepped back, his scent lingering a little in my nostrils, making me slightly light-headed.

"Yes," I breathed, "I'm fine. Thanks."

He released my shoulders and tucked his hands into his pockets. I watched the motion covertly, taking in his black jeans (not torn this time), boots, and black t-shirt topped by a wrinkled red and black plaid flannel.

Mmmm… scrumptious.

I might have licked my lips a little.

Edward smiled and pulled one hand out of his pocket to run his fingers through his hair. His shirt pulled up a bit to reveal a sliver of stomach and the waistband of his underwear peeking above his low-slung jeans.

I might have drooled… just a little.

"Ummmm…" he began. "I'm actually glad I ran into you." He chuckled softly. "I mean… not that I ran into you… but that I saw you today. I mean… I see you every day… but…"

Was he rambling? Could he be… was he nervous?

He took a deep breath, releasing it through puffed cheeks and pursed lips. "Anyway, what I meant was that I was hoping to talk to you."

I was stunned. So I blurted out the first thing that came to mind, albeit a little rudely. "To me? About what?"

Edward reddened a little and looked down. "Nothing really… I just thought maybe we could get a cup of coffee… or something?"

Holy crap.

Holy crap!

He was asking me out. After the whole knock-knock debacle… and the apparent-ignoring-but-in-reality-stalking… he was actually asking me out.

And at that moment he was looking at me, waiting for an answer.

Say something Bella!

"Ummm… sure, I'd like that," I said and his smile brightened. "But I have to go to work now…" His smile faded a little. "You could come…" I added quickly. "I mean if you want coffee... I work at Starbucks…ummmm… so if you, you know want to come with me, you could have some coffee…"

Yeah. He gets it Bella. They have coffee at Starbucks. Brilliant.

Now, you can’t just ignore a short story that won two awards in one contest, can you?? I didn’t think so :)

Mrs. White finds out What Happens in Vegas Does NOT Stay in Vegas with Twilightmommyto4girls!

Let’s be honest here for a minute. Have you even done anything that you REALLY regretted the next day? Like, something so bad it would have your family threatening to disown you? Maybe even have your best friend calling all over town trying to find out who might have purchased the boulder sized diamond perched on your finger? No? Apparently you’ve never been to Las Vegas. I hear those things happen on a regular basis. And believe me, I’m already planning my trip.

What Happens in Vegas Does NOT Stay in Vegas is a fun and slightly crazy story by twilightmommyto4girls. Originally written as an o/s for the Public Lovin’ Contest, this story cashes in on the hotness of Emmett, shaken and stirred with the sweetness of Bella. It’s a gamble, but it wins big. It’s a deal that totally pays off.

Bella Swan is an up and coming doctor from Seattle who is whisked away for a weekend celebration to Vegas by her best friend, Jacob Black. After being felt up by a very drunk and engaged Edward, she is saved by brother of the groom, Emmett Cullen. The attraction is instant, and before they know it, they are partying the night away. After Bella wakes up in Emmett’s room the next morning, and realizes she’s late for her flight home, she hurries out without one word to him. It isn’t until she and Jake are settled on the plane that he points out a small detail she has managed to miss…the rather large engagement and wedding rings that are sparkling on the ring finger of her left hand.

This story is so funny and very sweet, though there is some drama to be had too. While it’s not cannon, it’s easy to cheer on this Bella and Emmett, who seem to be so perfectly matched to one another. The way they battle the odds and fight for what they want is heart warming. And did I mention the lemons are smokin’ hot? No? Well…they are. What Happens in Vegas Does NOT Stay in Vegas is a story that will have you placing your bets and winning big when it comes to falling in love with it. Trust me…once you start reading, you’ll be saying “Hit Me!” at the end of every chapter. This story is one gamble that really strikes it rich!

**********

"No," I replied. "He'll just kill me for getting married without even knowing my husband's last name!"

Jake started to laugh wholeheartedly. "You just became a country song, Baby Girl," he laughed.

"What?" I asked.

Jake grinned at me wickedly. I had just asked him to sing. He loved to sing, though he was terrible at it! Especially when he sang with a funny accent. This was a disaster waiting to happen!

"I don't even know my last name.

My momma would be so ashamed.

It started off, "Hey cutie, where are you from?"

And then it turned into, "Oh no, what have I done?"

And I don't even know my last name," he crooned rather loudly in his best female country singer's voice.

It wasn't good and people around us began to stare or shush him. So embarrassed!

I buried my head in my hands again and the tears began to fall.

"I am a country song," I sniffled.

"Well, just sorta," Jake said. "She married a guy with a pinto. You married a guy with a limo and a ring from Tiffany's." 

Mrs. White: Hey there twilightmommyof4girls!
twilightmommyof4girls: Hi, Mrs. White!

MW: Wow, I’m so excited to be in Vegas. I’m hoping my disguise is good enough that I don’t get thrown out of any casinos again.
TM: I'm excited too...only not about Vegas... You're a freaking celebrity!!

MW: Oh please, I'm not famous or anything. Wait, do you think this could get me in with Robert Pattinson? Hmmmm, I might have to play up this celebrity thing... Anyway, let's start out easy with some slot machines. So, how did you get started in fan fic?
TM: In September 08 my daughter wanted to read the Twilight books. My kids lead a VERY sheltered life and I decided that I would read it before she could. 4 days later.... I had read all four and went online to see what else there was out there. I found FF in October and I fell in love, reading as much as I could. Then I came across a fic and noticed that the author was a mid thirties mom like me. It didn't take long for me to decide to try my hand at it.

MW: Hmmm, I can identify with that. Hey, let’s get some shots going here, how about some food too?
TM: I do love some lemon meringue pie…

MW: Yum! Booze and Pie…the breakfast of champions! So, what’s the first story you read?
TM: My first??? The first story that I fell in love with was The Cullen Brothers by AceMcKean. Talking to her gave me the courage to write my own. Now we beta for each other. :)

MW: **drops a quarter on the floor** It wasn’t Wide Awake? Huh, finally found me an author who didn’t get her fan fic cherry popped by Angstgoddess003.
TM: **blushes** I didn't even read that one until a little while ago... **blushes again from the embarrassment of it all** 

MW: Well, better late than never, you know? What’s your favorite fan fic story and why?
TW: Hmmm.... I have to say Femme Docs and Kevlar Knights by ACullenWannabe. The characters are so flawed but so perfect at the same time. I actually love all of her stories, but that one was the first one I fell in love with. I could probably list any of her stories... great story lines, wonderful characters... and I do like me some LEMON meringue pie!

MW: Hmmm, another one I need to check out. **looks around** Seriously, where is our pie and booze? These waiters are so slow. Hey, do you have anything pierced?
TW: Just my ears.

MW: Bummer. I was hoping you had some piercing tips for me. How did you come up with the idea for you stories?
TW: It differs from story to story. For Searching, I just went with a little plot bunny that was scrambling through my brain... What if Edward didn't leave then... What if it was him that ended up hurting her? For A Mother's Choice, I read so many stories where someone stays behind but never Esme, a mother who loved her daughter and realized her son was just wrong. Once Upon A Stormy Night was created out of a desire to lay off the angst a little. Fun, flirty and lemony! The Perfect Doctor's Wife was my first time leaving writing E & B. But only sort of. I got so much hate mail for that. And for reference Rosalie is Bella in costume! A lot of people missed that. :) Interview With A Vampire was fun and challenging and my biggest source of writer's block at the moment. The premise is that the Cullen’s are real and being interviewed by Larry King. The questions were sent by readers. It was fun! The Ghosts of My Past was written for a contest...but then Edward wouldn't shut up in my brain and wanted everyone to know he really wasn't a dickhead and redeem himself. What Happens In Vegas DOES NOT Stay In Vegas was written for another contest, as a challenge to myself to see if I could write anyone other than Edward/Bella. I wasn't in love with Emmett and Bella as a couple to start but I love them now!! I love the Emmett I created there.

MW: I like Emmett, he’s hot and so funny.
TW: Yeah... HOT!!!!

MW: Hey, how many purses do you have?
TW: Too many... twelve or so. I just can't throw any out.

MW: Sounds like me, I mean the inability to throw anything out. I have so many kids roaming around my house right now. Gee, I hope they didn’t run off the babysitter again.
TW: Crap! Was I supposed to leave mine with a babysitter??? Damn it! I knew I forgot something...

MW: Yeah, one visit from child welfare services and you'd think I was negligent or something. Luckily that case worker was cute... **quirks eyebrow** I wanted to ask, who is your favorite character to write?
TW: Bella. She has so much room to grow as a character.

MW: Nice. I like Bella. I’m jealous of Bella, but I like her. I mean really, did you see the way Edward was with her in the meadow at the beginning of the Eclipse movie? Oh melt me…I about slid out of my seat!
TW: Uh, yeah, I saw it four times.

MW: **glares** Oh man, you’ve got me beat. I’ve only seen it three times. Looks like I need to sneak back to the theater again.
TW: There is a theater just around the corner... I think I could be convinced to go for five!! Oh the hotness!

MW: Oh totally, tomorrow before we hit the airport, that theater is ours! Now, how did you meet and get your beta?
TW: AceMcKean was a writer that I admired and so I told her so. After I started writing we just kind of fell into a mutual betaing situation. I also have great prereaders that I met through comments and then chatting. So many awesome people on FF!!!

MW: There are awesome people on FF, I know a lot of them. Probably even a few of the awesome ones you know. :D Oh hey, you ever been to China?
TW: Um, no.

MW: Oh, just wondered. Hey, what’s your favorite time of day?
TW: Early morning. No one else is up and I have no pressure to do anything else.

MW: Ew, morning. No…I’m a night owl. Once the kids all crash, it’s party time for Mrs. White! So, I was wondering, how does it make you feel when people gush over you and your stories?
TW: Giddy! I love it when people get the subtleties that I put in and notice where I'm going with things before I get there.

MW: Yeah, that is nice. Oooooo, look at that waiter over there… Wonder what I’d have to do to get him to help me back to my room? So, do you ever use any people from real life in your stories?
TW: All the time, usually just the essence of who they are, but in What Happens In Vegas Does Not Stay In Vegas, one of my friends is gonna get up close and personal with Edward.

MW: Hmmm, it would be nice to get up close and personal with Edward. I can just imagine… **sighs** I think I sometimes do that too much.
TW: Me too... ME too!!!

MW: Let’s hit the Blackjack tables. I wanted to ask, which Twilight saga book is your favorite? And what’s your opinion on Breaking Dawn?
TW: I like the original book... then Eclipse. Breaking Dawn was best described by my sister (17) “It was like FF gone bad.” There was so much better that she could have done”... and I really hate that Jake imprinted on Renesmee... That's creepy and I would have ripped his head off. He certainly wouldn't be spending time with my child... Ick!

MW: **hee-hee** Yeah, I like that Jake imprinted on Renesmee. Made me feel like that’s why he was so attracted to Bella. At least that’s how I justified it in my head.
TW: True...but I still wouldn't have let him near my baby... Well maybe if I had ripped his big wolfy balls and butt off.... but only maybe!

MW: You know, they could totally do a reality tv show here in the casino. Look at how some of these people are dressed! They go into public like that. Wow… **adjusts her sequined bra and feathered headband** So if you could be on any reality tv show, what would it be?
TW: Ultimate Cake Off. Seriously I make great cakes, fondant, icing roses... you name it. I love fancy cakes and do them all the time

MW: That’s cool! I love to eat cake…especially when it’s pretty.
TW: Well that would eliminate the kitty litter box cake I made for a friend's birthday and the banging bikini bod I made for my brother's 18th... but other than that....

MW: **stares at twilightmommyof4girls** Kitty litter box cake? That's genius! Wow... And a bikini bod cake? Did you get a real live model for that one? **snickers** Now, if you could give one piece of advice to a new author, what would it be?
TW: Go for it. But please for the love of God, get a beta. There are so many good stories that go bad because of grammatical errors, spelling mistakes and punctuation catastrophes.

MW: Oh man, I totally agree. Beta’s should be mandatory, and prereaders too. They really are so helpful. 

TW: Amen!

MW: Okay, I’m bored with this. How about we catch a show? I hear they have a Princess’s Gone Bad show. There are boobs everywhere! I’ll bet we could find some good guys there.   

TW: I think I look most like Belle...but I don't sing!

MW: Oh that’s okay. The Little Mermaid didn’t talk to Prince Eric and she totally landed him. TW: How true... With 4 daughters, I've seen that far too many times... **shivers**

MW: Yeah, but seriously, when Prince Eric first shows up on the boat deck? Hello Mr. Cartoon Man Meat! Yum! Now, what is your favorite part about fan fic and the Twilight fandom?  

TW: The people that take the time to review. Seriously, the people themselves make all of this fun and worth all the time it takes me to get my ideas from brain to screen!

MW: That is nice. Reviews are lovely, and kinda inspirational. Almost as good as new pictures of RobPorn. I do love that RPattz.  

TW: Me too, but at this point I feel so unoriginal.

MW: Ahhh yes, so many of us love him. That’s why I have a backup. Just in case Rob never realizes that he loves me, I’ll still have someone to love…and make my own lemons with.  
TW: Me too. And my guy LOVES that I read and write FF. He figures he gets lucky so much more often.

MW: Lucky! That's so nice of him. Mr. White didn't like it, hence he no longer resides in my house. Or at least that's what the restraining order says. So, yeah, this show sucks. Tiaras and jewel encrusted thongs. And seriously, not one guy in here under fifty. Gross.
TW: **shivers** No complaints here. Look at that old creepy guy in the corner! I think he's looking our way!

MW: Ewww! That's all kinds of wrong! Let’s hit one of those laser shows or that amusement park. May as well, I think all the good guys have hooked up by this point. Though I could use a little more liquor.
TW: Let's go! Fast he's coming this way!

MW: Hello exit door! Hey, I was wondering, what is your favorite ALMOST curse word?
TW: Monkey Butt! LOL!! About ten years ago when my oldest kid was 4, I stubbed my toe and was about to yell Mother F#$^ but I stopped myself at Mo...and yelled Monkey Butt instead. She loved it and the expression was born. We all still use it now.

MW: **hee-hee** That’s cute. :D Monkey butt…nice one.
TW: Yes, well, that’s also kinda how I chose my user name. I am a mom of 4 girls and love Twilight. So boring!

MW: Oh no, you’re not boring! Are you kidding? That outfit you’ve got on is drawing a LOT of attention.
TW: Yeah, well, yesterday I was stuck at a boring meeting all day and a coworker grabbed me and took me to the mall. A lingerie store was closing down and everything was 70% off. I spend almost $200...my hubby didn't complain at all!!

MW: And why should he? It’s like eye candy for him. Now, did they have any corsets there? I’m always on the look out for a new one. My neighbor guy keeps ripping the ones I have. He has this whole “I’m a vampire” fetish, he likes to tear things off of me.
TW: **Sigh**

MW: Well, since the rides are all closing down, and we haven’t found any ‘rides’ of our own yet, I guess we should head back to our rooms. One more question before we hit the sack. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
TW: Come on in. :)

MW: Oh, you’re such a good girl. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.
TW: Thank God!! I mean Thanks Mrs. W!

MW: Yeah, no problem. Oh, lookie there…it looks like that hottie waiter just got off work. And he has a hottie waiter friend. I think we need to check that out.
TW: You know, my daughter made me a Boys of Twilight background with sexy ass pics of all the Twilight guys! They look just like those waiters. I’m in! Look I think you can count their abs...two, four.....

MW: Alrighty then. **pushes up her boobs and puckers her lips** These cuties won’t know what hit them. I’m feeling a little naughty cowgirl comin’ on.
TW: Ride 'Em Cowgirl! Let's hope what happens in Vegas stays there...this time!