Professor Plum goes Through the Flames by Sparkling Twilight!

So I fell beyond in love with this fic that I came across while browsing my Facebook timeline last week. Through the Flames by SparklingTwilight has made me smile and had me in tears in a matter of sentences. I was hesistant to begin it at first because I tend to shy away from third person POV but I learned my lesson... Never judge a fic by its POV.

The preface is a descriptive narrative that gave me goosebumps. Here’s a little taste:

Within the arms of their saviors, those trapped and left behind are delivered from the beast's clutches and into the awaiting embraces of their loved ones. Praises and sentiments of profound gratitude are showered upon the men, but the words, gestures, and watery smiles can only be savored for a fraction of a moment. They still have a demon to tame and conquer.
It's what they were born to do.
It's what they live for.
They are our true modern day heroes.
They are...Firefighters.

Edward Cullen is the oldest son of Carlisle Cullen, also known as ‘The Chief’. From the beginning you can see that he is the person that Jasper and Emmett, his two younger siblings who are also firemen in the same house, look up to and turn to for guidance. While Edward dedicates the majority of his time to his job and the firehouse, Jasper and Emmett are both married and have families and tend to push off their work responsibilities on Edward. Being the good brother that he is, Edward accommodates them. However, there are some favors that require a payback at the end...

Any chance I can get you to throw my turnout gear in the wash when you get there? Those things smell like ass," Em asked with a smile in his voice.

Edward slammed the dishwasher door shut, gritting his teeth as he shook his head and breathed deeply through his nose. It wasn't enough to contain his irritation, however. He was sick and tired of constantly being walked all over by his younger siblings.

"What the fuck, Emmett! You've been off for two goddamn days now, why didn't you do that shit while you were off? What the fuck are you gonna wear if we get called to a fire?"
 

"Your old gear? It's still at the station right?" he proceeded hesitantly, knowing it was only quarter after five in the morning and he'd already pushed his eldest brother over the edge. That wasn't really the best way to start a day in which they'd be spending a full twenty four hours together nonstop.
 

Edward rubbed circles on his temples, reminding himself over and over again that this was his baby brother and it was his duty to make sure he was taken care of. And part of taking care of him meant taking care of his turnout gear so it'd protect him when it needed to on a call.
 

"You're a pain in my ass, Em. You're lucky we're blood related or I would have hosed you by now...not saying I won't," Edward grumped as he climbs the stairs towards the shower.
 

"Sooo...is that a yes? You'll wash my gear?" he asked, holding in his victory punch until he received confirmation.
 

"Sure...after I let Tango piss all over it, ya lazy shit," Edward smirked, though in the back of his mind it really didn't seem like all that bad of an idea.
 

"Thanks, bro...but don't let..."
 

"Yeah, yeah...I gotta go," Edward cut him off, not wanting to hear his whining that would inevitably turn into him asking for yet another favor before six am.
 

"Pick Jasper up on your way in since I won't be able to do it now. His car's in the shop again and Alice has to work today, and I swear to God, Emmett, be on time or I will hose your ass!" he warned before hanging up the phone.

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Emmett's battered and outdated Jeep Cherokee with bald tires came flying into the parking lot. Edward waited patiently against the side of the building for his brothers to exit the vehicle, and the moment they did and began to approach him with apologies and excuses on the tips of their tongues, he pulled the fire hose from behind his back and unleashed a steady stream of water onto the pair of them, knocking them both clear off their feet. Curses and enraged shouts echoed between the buildings as his brothers flopped around on the ground trying to escape the powerful spray. The rest of their crew came flying around the corner at the sounds of the commotion and cracked up hysterically at the sight that greeted them as Edward turned the nozzle off.

"I warned you I'd hose your ass if you were late again," Edward grinned smugly as they picked themselves up off the blacktop.

We’re introduced to Alec who is a lifelong friend of Edward’s who is there when there are things that Edward can’t vent to anyone else. When a call comes in, the men spring into action. At the scene, Edward is injured when he saves Emmett from a potentially deadly situation. Detailed descriptions provide intense images as if you can visualize everything unfolding before your eyes. It is the call that comes in later that night that left a haunting image in my mind after reading it... SparklingTwilight called it the Devil’s Muse and provided the following image 

.

It is that call that brings Isabella Swan into Edward’s life but almost costing him is own. Bella is missing and is assumed to be in the building. Edward, despite the pleas from his father to wait, rushes into the five alarm fire determined to rescue the missing woman. With no radio contact and no back up, he proceeds deeper into the firey building. The fairly easy part was finding her, it was the getting out alive part that posed the greatest threat.

"Stay with me, Bella...you can do this, just stay with me," he spoke to her unconscious form in his arms. He was no longer sure if it was to comfort her or himself with the increasing frequency of foundation tremors, echoes of falling debris that he was sure by now were parts of ceilings caving in from the weight of the water being unleashed on the building.

By the light of the Muse's dancing tendrils of fire, Edward carefully descended the rear stairwell, testing each step before bearing the entirety of their weight upon each plank. As he neared the bottom, he began to hear the familiar voices of his fellow station brothers and relief began to pump furiously through every inch of his aching, exhausted body.

But that wicked Devil's Muse still had tricks up her sleeves, luring him into a sense of false security at their proximity to safety before demolishing it just as quickly.

With a haunting bone chilling sigh, a gust of wind blew through the last of the crumbling skeletal frame of the building's ground floor, reigniting withering flames and fueling them; encouraging them to grow and spread and devour the domain she'd claimed as her own in its entirety with her captives trapped within.

Towering flames slithered their ways up the walls and across the ceiling, siphoning every last bit of oxygen within the caged inferno with a menacing rumble caused by the multiplying numbers of tendrils snapping at the air like the tips of bullwhips.

"Get out of there!" Alec yelled at Edward as he stood frozen, Bella in his arms, staring at the blazing manifestation of the Muse's fury at their near escape. The powerful stream of water under Alec and Felix's control had little effect in taming her wrath as they tried to clear him a passage through the walls of flames.

Twenty five feet stood between the demon's captives and their freedom, between life and death, suffocating heat and fresh cool air. Twenty five feet between triumph and failure, and as Edward took his first hasty steps toward the end of his latest dance with the Devil's Muse, her rage at his having defeated her yet again climaxed.

One thing I’ve learned while reading this story is that when they issue a tissue warning, LISTEN! There are scenes written that left me snot sobbing at three o’clock in the morning... I feel like I’m possibly over sharing with parts of the story but there are so many parts that overwhelmed me in the best way possible. This story is beautifully written and well researched. The comradery between the siblings and the ‘brothers’ on the job is touching and extremely moving. There are 22 chapters posted so far and I’m biting my nails until the next one.

Here’s SparklingTwilight’s twitter and her fanfiction profile. Make sure that if you read this, you show her some love. She was tempted to pull a few chapters back but has decided against it as of now... I’ll leave you with the Fireman’s Prayer which she has posted in Chapter 5.

When I am called to duty, God
whenever flames may rage,
Give me the strength to save some life
Whatever be its age.
Help me to embrace a little child
Before it’s too late,
Or some older person
from the horror of that fate.
Enable me to be alert
And hear the weakest shout,
And quickly and efficiently
to put the fire out.
I want to fill my calling
and give the best in me,
To guard my neighbor
And protect his property.
And if according to Your will
I have to lose my life,
Please bless with Your protecting hand
My children and my wife

Until next time Loves!

Mrs. White says Lets Get Physical with Lalina!

Gym. Workout. Weight loss. Diet. Those are dirty words in my house. If every meal doesn’t include some form of chocolate and butter, it’s wrong. Oh, and I hear liquor is frowned upon by all those health experts too. What the… How is a girl supposed to cope with a lack of RPattz in her life without tequila or vodka on the ready, each and every day? And really, when you combine those with RobPorn, it’s almost like he’s actually there.

Anyhow, since I couldn’t bring myself to step away from the computer and go to the gym, I decided to start reading a story about doing it instead. It’s the next best thing, right? I had no idea the things I was missing out on! Let’s Get Physical by Lalina is a fun and angsty story that will have you dialing up your closest fitness center and scheduling an appointment with a personal trainer before you even know what hit you!

Let’s Get Physical is the story of Bella, a mid thirties, slightly over weight woman who has recently split from her husband. After years of listening to him tell her that she’s not good enough, she finds herself actually believing him. Once she finally decides she’s tired of being “fat” she goes to the gym in town, intent on hiring a personal trainer. Too bad for her the female trainer is booked solid, leaving only the male trainer, Edward. He’s beautiful, funny, and everything Bella has ever dreamed of in a man. Only thing is, he’s a tad bit younger than Bella, but really, what’s seven years to a Cougar? As they begin working out together, Bella fights the feelings she has for him, knowing that no mid twenties guy who looks like Edward would ever be interested in her. She’s wrong.

What I love about this story is that the characters are real. They aren’t cartoonish and silly, they are genuine and honest. I love that Edward is a tad bit picky about the women he dates, only ever choosing gorgeous and trim ladies to share his time with. As he gets to know Bella, he quickly finds himself captivated by her wit, her personality, and her smile. This Edward slowly evolves before our eyes, turning from a typical, lady killer, pretty boy who dwells on physical appearance to an endearing, humble, courageous man who is able to see the true beauty that lies within. He’s conflicted as the story begins, because his attraction to Bella is something he’s never felt before, yet it’s so strong and persistent, he can’t deny it or turn it off. Will Edward be able to convince Bella that his feelings are true? Will Bella let Jane’s evil little plans destroy her chance at happiness? What will Edward say when he finds out that Bella is technically still married? And really, what’s all this talk about Bella rewarding herself for losing weight by getting it on with Edward?

Let’s Get Physical has quickly become one of my new favorite stories, and not just because I feel like I’ve met my workout requirements for the week after I read about Bella doing yoga. I love the characters, I love the story line, and I love the angst that is packed nicely into this tight little package. Oh, and did I mention how small of a “package” Bella’s soon-to-be ex-husband James has? Let’s just say, Edward’s packing a lot more in that department, if you know what I mean. Do yourself a favor and let this Trainerward work you over. You’ll never look at gyms the same way again.

**********

It was because he was turning her on so much that when Edward asked her in the middle of doing crunches if she'd given any thought to what her reward would be, that her true answer went sailing from between her lips before she had a chance to censor it.

"I want to get fucked," she said while on the rise. "Hard." Edward's eyes nearly popped out of his head at her crude statement. She figured since the cat was out of the bag, she may as well just continue. Her words were punctuated each time she executed a body curl. "I want…one night…of raw…pure…sex…all night…every position." Bella collapsed to the ground breathing heavy. "That's what I want."

It was then that what she actually said hit her. Her legs were socked between Edward's, his hands were on her knees to keep her stable, and he was altogether too close. She was completely mortified at her admission, and even though her face was already red due to exertion, she felt it flame even hotter as she stared up at the ceiling in utter humiliation.

"Oh God," she groaned, throwing both arms over her face. She was too ashamed to even look at Edward. "Just…agh…can you just forget I said all of that?"

"Why?" he asked her in a low voice.

"Just 'cause," she begged, still unable to look at him. "That wasn't supposed to come out. It's just been…a…really long time. And plus, it's not like it's ever going to happen."

"Why not?" he asked again, his voice still low, curious, almost seductive.

"'Cause I have no one to do it with," she answered. Bella thought her level of embarrassment couldn't have gotten any worse. It turned out she was wrong. Having to admit to Edward that no one would fuck her was about as rock bottom as she could get.

And then he said the one thing that made her heart completely stop.

"What if it was me?"

XOXOXOX

Edward stared down at Bella in stunned disbelief. He couldn't believe that he had just offered her his sexual services. He wasn't sure why, but when she admitted what she wanted her reward to be, unlike the night before when his visualization of doing more with her had failed, this time, images pounded into his brain of him and Bella in every possible sexual position imaginable.

Maybe it had something to do with the irrational jealousy he'd felt over that guy Jacob. Even though Bella told him they were just friends, how did he know that she wouldn't ask him to fuck her senseless? And how did he know that Jacob wouldn't just say yes? Something about that huge guy all over Bella had made Edward rage. For some inexplicable reason, he wanted to make sure that if anyone was with Bella, it would be him.

It could also do with the fact that when she had said she wanted to be fucked. Hard. His cock had given an almighty jerk in his pants, practically volunteering for the job. Apparently, his mouth was on the same damned wavelength because before he knew it, he was asking her if she'd let him be the one. In his head he had added the – Hard.

"'Scuse me?" she finally squeaked out, keeping her arms over her face.

Lie! His brain screamed. Deny it! It's not too late to take it back and make yourself look like less of an ass!

"I…uh…" He cleared his throat. "I said, what if it was with me?"

"Are you shitting me?" she asked, her voice full of disbelief.

"Uhhh…no."

Bella finally threw her arms away from her face and sat up partially, resting her weight on her elbows. She squinted up at him with her head cocked to the side. "Look…Edward. I appreciate the great lengths you're going through to get me into shape, but this may just be a little bit above and beyond."

"You're starting to give me a complex," Edward complained. "What's wrong with me?"

"Edward, why would someone who looks like you, ever in a million years fuck someone who looks like me? Besides pity, of course."

"Are we going to do this again? And why would you automatically assume it was just a pity fuck?"

"Because what else would it be?"

**********

Mrs. White: Hey Lalina! Wow, this gym is a lot more crowded than I thought.

Lalina: Mmmm nice eye candy though! Good call. ;)

MW: Yeah, Hottie Neighbor Guy said his friends all work out here. He had a swimming party...this gym works, let me tell you.

Lalina: Think they'll catch on if we just stand here staring?

MW: Wait, what? I was distracted by that guy in the corner lifting weights. Um, let's grab these treadmills and I think we'll be good.

Lalina: **looks at treadmill thingamabobbies** How the hell does this thing work?

MW: Beats me. I think we just jump on and it goes.

Lalina: I don't think that's the way it works... Where the fuck is Trainerward when you need him? **pushes buttons at random**

MW: Oh, good idea! Let's see if they have a Trainerward here that we can lure over. So, in the meantime, how did you get started in fan fic?

Lalina: I was on a mom’s board and frequenting a thread that was created for Twilight junkies when another mom posted the link to a story on fanfiction.net. I started fic diving but couldn’t find any really good Isle Esme missing scenes so I decided to write my own. :)) The rest is history!

MW: Wow, sounds interesting. I think I'm gonna go with the button that says "Slower than a snail's stroll." I hope that's not too fast.

Lalina: Yeah really, I didn't get a butt like this from walking around fast, tell you that much!

MW: Yeah, the only time I get a burst of energy is when they have a sale at the lingerie store. Or the sex toy shop.

Lalina: Heh... Ok, I think I finally got this thing working. **ogles the guy on the leg spreader**

MW: Oh nice! Man, you look good in that out fit. **adjusts her sports bra** Yeah, so what's the first story you read?

Lalina: Aww this ole thing? **giggles** This is horrible, but I honestly can’t remember the name! It was about Bella and Edward going to a party and that’s pretty much all I remember! **hee-hee**

MW: Hmmmm, I like parties. And I don't mean Tupperware parties. Wait, that's an old outfit? I had to buy something special for today.

Lalina: Did you visit Alice? ;)

MW: I should have! Nah, I got some retired hooker that only wanted to show me tube tops and micro mini's. Oh, and 6 inch heels.

Lalina: Well you certainly know how to work it, girl!

MW: Yes, well, lot's of practice. What can I say? Oh and how many pairs of shoes do you have? You can borrow a few of the hooker heels I bought...

Lalin: Erm…too many according to hubs. :)) They have to have that really thick platform though, and clear plastic only.

MW: Oh heck yes! When I go whore, I go all the way!

Lalina: Awesome!

MW: Yeah, so what's your favorite fan fic story?

Lalina: Irritable Grizzly Adams by Caligula42. It’s just a beautifully written story. Her imagery is sublime, and she writes gorgeous prose. Also, the fact that it’s still in my alerts even though she doesn’t get a chance to update often is a pretty good indicator of love! :)) I just wish she didn't have a life so I could get updates all the time. **sigh**

MW: Oh I know, real life is always getting in the way. My kids want dinner, or they need a ride to school. Such a pain.

Lalina: Same here! Right now I'm being summoned to tuck mine into bed!

MW: That’s what babysitters are for. **whistles while scanning the room for hot guys to ogle** OH! Leg cramp! Leg cramp!!

Lalina: **massages Mrs. White’s leg** Ooh... Ooohhhh... Nice lambchop hunny!

MW: You're so good. You have, like, magic fingers. Nice. **winks at Lalina* * So, how did you come up with the idea for your story?

Lalina: I blame GLEE! After the episode with Olivia Newton John I had the song Let’s Get Physical stuck in my head for WEEKS. It was awful! And then one day as I was singing, I remembered her video and the idea for an overweight Bella and personal trainer Edward came to me.

MW: Yeah, keep them fingers going there, babe. So, how does it make you feel when people gush over you and your stories?

Lalina: Umm… weird! LOL… I love it when someone tells me they enjoy my stories, that’s good enough for me, I don’t need gushing. :)) Let’s save the gushing for Bella’s girly bits! Heh… Really, I’m just a chick who happens to write stuff. Nothing special, really, so it still really surprises me when someone goes fangirly on me.

MW: Oh, I think a few people out there in the fandom wouldn't agree with that. They think you're pretty special.

Lalina: I don't know... I don't do diva. **hee-hee** I'd rather just joke around and have fun with my readers. How's that feel? Better?

MW: **hhhmmmmm** That feels pretty great. If you're not careful, I'm gonna get fake leg cramps every time I see you. Say, you think lifting a flask to my mouth 50 times a day counts as weight lifting?

Lalina: Depends on how much is in the flask. **nods** : Maybe you should do less reps, more weights :D Liquid weight, that is.

MW: Well, it starts out full... So, who is your favorite character to write?

Lalina: It’s different every story but I seem to be partial to Edward. It’s interesting to me to try and write a male POV and he’s usually such a character!

MW: Hmmmm, I'm partial to Edward too...

Lalina: I love my Wards... **sigh**

MW: I think that Olivia Newton John headband of yours is really turning some heads.

Lalina: Maybe I can get the DJ to play Let's Get Physical?

MW: Oh yeah! **looks at everyone with their ipods** Let's ask the cute guy behind the desk.

Lalina: You go on ahead, he's checking out your hookah shewz.

MW: Yeah, and why wouldn't he? They are slut-tastic! Oh, I was gonna ask you how you got your beta?

Lalina: My Beta is Beowulfgirl :)) She was an avid reader of TSL. Originally, I wasn’t betaing my chapters on FFN with the plan to have them betad later to replace the originals (I was terribly impatient and didn’t want to wait for edits before posting!) Beowulfgirl approached me to see if I needed a beta because of this. We got to talking, and I put her through stringent tests which she passed! Heh… Basically, I needed someone who could get edited chapters back to me relatively quickly, and she’s awesome like that. She also strikes a great balance between constructive criticism and blowing sunshine up my butt. A hard thing to find, let me tell you!

MW: Ohhhh... HEY! Which Disney Princess most closely resembles you and why?

Lalina: I suppose Belle from Beauty and the Beast. Mostly because she has the brown hair and eyes, she’s lippy and stands up for what she wants and she’s a daddy’s girl. Also cause my hubs can be kind of beastly!

MW: Beastly, huh? Does he have any brothers? **flinches at Lalina’s raised eyebrow** Don't look at me like that.

Lalina: 5 actually. ;) Pretty sure 3 of them are single.

MW: Score! I'm SO on that. So, I meant to ask you, which Twilight saga book is your favorite? And what’s your opinion on Breaking Dawn?

Lalina: Twilight is my favorite. I didn’t mind BD, but I read all 4 books in a row (devoured them in less than a week would be a better description!) so I didn’t have the anticipation of waiting. I also like Jacob so I didn’t mind getting his POV in the story even if it was inconsistent with the other 3. What I DIDN’T like was making Jacob into pretty much a pedophile. That squicked me right the heck out. I would have rather he just found some regular girl to imprint on. It felt too contrived. The last book was also so busy in comparison the first 3, and I was disappointed that the big battle turned in to the fight that never was. It wasn’t my favorite but it wasn’t my least liked of the 4, either.

MW: Yep, me too. Though I'm okay with the imprinting thing. It makes me feel not so guilty for wanting RPattz.

Lalina: Ick.... No, baby loving Jacob was a deal breaker for me. I don't care if SM did try and prepare us with the Quil/Claire pairing. I hated it.

MW: Yeah, I know you're not the only one. So, if you could get it on with any character from one of your stories, who would it be and why?

Lalina: Just ONE?? Crap… I love all my Wards! ahaa

MW: Oh heck yes! How about we try those bike machine things? They don't look too stressful. Plus did you see the guy working out in front of those?

Lalina: No, I missed him. Okay! Biking it is :D

MW: I'll take the one with the streamers on the handle bars.

Lalina: Damnit! This one's even got buttons TOO!

MW: **hee-hee** Let's just start pushing them and see what happens?

Lalina: Ummmm, I don't think you push these kind.

MW: Oh no. Mine has a little dial thingie. It's got all these numbers, 5, 10, 15, 20... What do you think that means?

Lalina: You're asking me??

MW: Right, nevermind. **hee-hee** So, If you could give one piece of advice to a new author, what would it be?

Lalina: Don’t let the reviews rule you. I fell into this trap as well when I first started writing fanfic, wondering what I was doing wrong and why other stories seemed to reel in the reviews while mine didn’t. The number of reviews you get is NOT indicative of how good your writing is.

MW: So true. Did you see the way that guy bends? I'll bet he could bend me...

Lalina: Nice tushy. I'm a sucker for nice arms... mm mm mmm

MW: Yeah...I like shoulders. Oh, hey, who is your celebrity crush?

Lalina: Again, only ONE?? lol… I suppose Milo Ventimiglia is at the top of that list. Something about that guy just makes me go humina humina! OH! And Channing Tatum too. **sigh** LOVE HIM!!

MW: **hangs head in shame** I didn't even know who Channing was until I saw Dear John. He's totally on my man meat radar now.

Lalina: Channing is my Mobward actually.

MW: Ohhh, I can totally see that! What is the last movie you saw in a theater?

Lalina: Need you ask? Eclipse! **heh**

MW: Yeah, me too, except my kids dragged me to see that Toy Story 3 movie. Darned cartoons that make me cry...

Lalina: Awww.... cartoons these days are horrible. I bawled for the first hour of UP. **sheesh**

MW: **whistles uncomfortably while trying to get her feet to stay on the pedal thingies** I never saw that one either. So, what is your favorite part about fan fic and the Twilight fandom?

Lalina: The friends we make. It’s such a huge community so to find like-minded people is a pleasure.

MW: Oh yeah!! I talk to my online friends more than my real life friends. That's not sad or pitiful, right?

Lalina: Not at all :D

MW: Okay good, as long as you say so. Hey, I watch Glee and Big Bang Theory. I love me the musicals and nerds.

Lalina: **pokes Mrs. White** New guy... ten o'clock!

MW: Oh wow!

Lalina: Love both those shows but once I get in a writing groove you just can't pull me out of it. :)

MW: Here, help me adjust my daisy dukes, I wanna flash a little more butt cheek as he walks by.

Lalina: **yanks Mrs. White’s shorts up higher**

MW: Nice. I think he noticed...

Lalina: Kinda hard not to! **smacks yer ass**

MW: **hee-hee** So, what is your favorite ALMOST curse word?

Lalina: Crap. I use it all the time! LOL

MW: NO WAY! Mine too!! It's crap-tastic!!

Lalina: LOL I like Crap-tacular myself

MW: Hmmm, yeah, that's nice too. :D

Lalina: It has a great ring to it! Like, did you read that craptacular fic?

MW: Heck yes it does! Hey, how about rapid fire questions? You game?

Lalina: Shoot. **heh-heh** Get it? Shoot? LOL

MW: **hee-hee** You're so snarky.

Lalina: **snark snark**

MW: If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?

Lalina: Right now, Australia so I could visit my crazy Aussie friends (even though they live on opposite sides of the damned country!)

MW: Do you listen to music while you write? Does music inspire your stories in any way?

Lalina: I do. Certain songs come to me as I write chapters, they don’t inspire the chapter itself but I think “Oh! Such and such song would really fit here.”

MW: What’s your favorite tv show from when you were a child?

Lalina: This is horrible… I can’t think of any! We didn’t watch much TV as kids.

MW: What’s your favorite item on a relish/vegetable tray?

Lalina: Carrots

MW: How did you choose your pen name/username?

Lalina: It’s a name I’ve used in other forums. I never expected to be a writer of fanficiton, it just kind of happened. Perhaps I would have been more imaginative if I’d known! :))

MW: What’s your favorite candy bar?

Lalina: You and your ‘favorite’ questions…and always to things where I have more than one favorite! HAH… I suppose Snickers.

MW: Um, I think I broke this bike thing. That blonde girl at the desk is looking at us weird. Do you think that's bad?

Lalina: As long as it doesn't start smoking, we're good!

MW: Cool. Dang, that hot guy is going into the yoga room. You think we should follow him?

Lalina: Yoga? I dunno... you need to be flexible for that stuff. You go be bendy, I'll lie on the floor and imitate a speed bump. :D

MW: Yeah, I'm very bendy. **hee-hee** Alright, one more question before I go get my bend on. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

Lalina: I’d like him to direct me to wherever my father may be so I could give him a hug and tell him how much I missed him all of these years.

MW: Ohhhh...that's so sweet.

Lalina: **sad smile**

MW: Let's see if I can cheer you up a bit. Looks like a new trainer just came on shift, and he's a red head. I'm thinking you need a good rub down, what do you say?

Lalina: I say Let's DO it!

MW: Yes!!

Lalina: Come on, bb... Trainerward awaits. ;)

Mean Mrs. Mustard has a little Embellishment bu BoydBlog!

With it being football season and all, I was watching a game and said “I’ve only read two football fics; I need to find a new one.” I love me a man in football gear. So when I went to find Footballward, I somehow came across Embellishment by BoydBlog which is not a football fic, at all, but does have an Edward in uniform. Let’s face it; a man in uniform is hot.

Bella and Alice are spending their summer in Australia and lucky for them two U.S. military ships are going to dock for a night before the servicemen and servicewomen conclude their tour. Of course, Alice wants to go out to the bars and see if she can properly thank a serviceman.

"Alice, they'll be, you know, just wanting to fuck some Aussie girls and we're not..."

"We're not Aussie, but we're here too, and I think our boys need a reward for all the hard work they do. I mean, they travel to foreign hostile lands to protect our freedom-"

"Since when have you been so patriotic Alice? The reason you wanted to get as far away as possible from the Continental U.S. was because the men were—what did you say—quote, 'Selfish fuckers who couldn't pleasure a woman if their life depended on it', end quote." I scoffed.

"So, you'd rather stay in and watch that god awful Australian Idol than come and meet some hot Marine that's been on his tour of duty in middle of the ocean for five months and would be salivating to buy you a few drinks and stick his hands up your skirt?"

"Um, yeah?"

"God, Bella. If I'd known you'd be such and stick in the mud, I would have asked Jessica to come to Australia with me. You seriously need to get laid," she admonished.

"OK, I'll go," I relented, because I knew she'd just keep going on and on until I did. "I just don't want to be some Marines pleasure device for all of like three minutes while he uses my body to scratch an itch, OK?"

Since Bella doesn’t want to have some random one night stand, with the advice of a friend, she decides to only talk to married military men since they are more likely to be faithful because they probably have a family waiting for them stateside.

I started walking towards the stairs when someone stepped in front of me. He was tall, very tall. He was wearing a white dress uniform; it looked more formal than Jasper's. I immediately took in the embellishments. This was an officer of the Navy, not a Marine. He was obviously a very important rank. He was smiling courteously at me.

"Excuse me, Miss, I was wondering if you knew anything about the history of this pub?"

I stared into his beautiful green-grey eyes. He was gorgeous. His skin, what I could see of it, was pale and smooth. The uniform covered every other inch of his body below his neck, which was graceful and strong. All concealed, except his beautiful face and hands.

I quickly, covertly looked at his left hand. He was wearing a simple gold band that looked too loose for his long pale finger.

"I'm sorry, I don't. I'm actually American. I'm just visiting Sydney. But I do believe they only renovated it four months ago." I stated, and smiled. He's married; he'd be safe to talk to...wouldn't he?

"I'm Bella Swan, it's nice to meet you."

"It's lovely to meet a fellow American so far from home. Miss Swan," he held his hand out to shake mine; staring at me intently. "I'm Commander Edward Cullen from the United States Navy."

I shook his hand. It was cool, which also seemed odd, considering the stifling summer heat and the fact he was wearing a full white dress uniform.

"Would you mind keeping me company tonight Miss Swan? I feel like sitting and absorbing the view. Maybe you can tell me your impressions of Sydney. I won't get a chance to see much and it would be nice to partake in a cold Australian beer."

Yes, chatting to an attractive married Commander in the Navy would be better than going home and watching TV. It would keep Alice off my back and alleviate my homesickness.

After Bella and Edward spend some time getting to know each other, Bella knows it’s time to say goodbye. She is slightly disappointed that Edward is married since he is such a great man but a revelation makes her happy beyond belief. I think you can guess it…

He started undoing the buttons on his Jacket. Five buttons, slowly. He deftly slid the jacket off his shoulders carefully, being mindful of the shoulder boards designating his rank, and placed it on the hanger, which he hooked on the back of the door. The tight white undershirt he wore framed his upper body magnificently; his arms were well defined, muscular.

I kicked off my low-heeled shoes and curled my legs underneath me on the bed. This was the most satisfying foreplay; watching Edward meticulously, and very sexily, remove his uniform, piece by piece. With his jacket removed, it was extremely obvious that he was very aroused. He looked over at me as he pulled the hem of his undershirt out from the waistband of his pants, peeling it up his torso and off.

Oh God, his body is indescribable.

He sat on the rocking chair. I watched in awe as his abdominal muscles flexed when the chair tipped forward with his weight and he removed his white shoes then his socks and placed them neatly, symmetrically under the chair.

By the time he started undoing his belt, I was melting with desire, panting and trembling. His breathing had also increased, and before I knew it he was standing in just his white Calvin Klein boxer briefs that hugged him tightly.

The silence was deafening.

I stayed seated on the bed. I was flushed with desire, waiting for him to tell me what he wanted.

But he didn't, he just gazed at me, hungrily, making my stomach twist in knots, thoroughly excited and anxious.

"Bella," he breathed. His hand raised mine; he brought it to his lips. "Every day, I tell people what to do. I bark orders. I reprimand sloppy performance. I drill commands until I can't stand the sound of my own voice."

His lips kissed my palm.

"Tell me what to do, tell me what you like, how you want me. I don't want to have to think about it, I just want to fulfill your needs exactly as you command me. No exploring, no guessing, just action. I need you to tell me, precisely. I want you to be in control, Bella. I relinquish all control to you."

Even though Bella is unsure of how to take control in the bedroom, she does an amazing job telling Edward what to do.

Embellishment is a one-shot, beautifully written, and the lemons are tasteful. I promise, you will not be disappointed. I suppose here is a little warning: The ending did make me cry because I thought of all the things military personnel renounce to serve our country.

What, no teaser of a lemon scene? Nope, I think you should just find out yourself. Edward taking his uniform off had me panting; you can only imagine what the actual sexing did…

Enjoy! Don’t forget to review, authors love ‘em.

Mr. Boody looks at an Art School Confidential!

Good morning, afternoon, or evening, Folks. Hope you all have a great week and continue to join us here at P.I.C.

The story I’m brining to you today is a fun, well written, multi-chapter by farkle. Art School Confidential is based on true events and actual people, which for me is one of the stories biggest draws.

Once again, this story is canon, AH. Bella is an art student, not necessarily struggling to get by, but living as an average student with her roommate Alice. She’s extremely OOC, at least in my eyes. The author has truly given Miss Swan her own characterizations. In fact, you’ll find this in all of the characters.

I love that the author doesn’t keep you waiting long to bring Edward into this story. In the first chapter, Bella and Edward have their first encounters when he poses for one of her classes – as a nude model. Naturally Bella finds him attractive, but sparks aren’t flying. There is no love at first site, or electric currents. He’s simply a hot guy, whom she has to paint.

After a serious of misfortunate events and embarrassments, Bella comes to the realization that Edward is her muse. She’s never painted so well in her life! Only problem is, he thinks she’s nuts – at least she thinks he does.

Ugh. I rolled my eyes and turned to Lauren. "That's right," I said with sarcastic cheerfulness. "Ever since Emmett I haven't found a man with a big enough dong! I've moved on to donkeys! Get a life Lauren. Who cares about a life model with a big dick?"

She gave me a smirk and a shrug, and I had a sinking feeling. I turned around slowly to see our model, the lovely Edward, standing in the doorway of the vending area. The tatty robe was loosely belted around him, showing a sliver of his chest, and his feet were bare. His face was nearly expressionless but for his raised eyebrows as he looked steadily at me. I felt the burning blush spread from my neck up over my cheeks.

It was really too much to hope he hadn't heard that. Open mouth, insert foot. I muttered excuse me and dashed past him.

I was so embarrassed for her I think I actually turned red. Pretty impressive for a dead guy, huh?

Edward does agree to model for Bella, as you might have guessed and they form a great friendship. One that you hope will last, but sometimes things just don’t work out that way. This story isn’t complete, so I’m sure there is still a lot for her to tell. I look forward to every upcoming chapter.

I stared. Edward, asleep on my sofa. It was like a Christmas present, all shiny and perfect under the tree.

I crept to the kitchen.

Nearly twenty minutes later I had coffee brewed, sausages cooking and was sliding the third batch of pancakes onto a warming plate. Edward stumbled into the kitchen, looking as worn out and squinty as I felt. Even rumpled, though, he was beautiful. So unfair.

"You cook," he growled, his voice raspy as he stumbled over to the coffee pot and stared at it.

"There are lots of things you don't know about me," I said, and he grunted in agreement.

I pushed a mug in front of him and watched furtively as he poured himself a cup and slugged it back. His face was scruffier than usual, a noticeable shadow around his chiseled jaw line. I wanted to touch it and see if it was scratchy or soft.

"I just hadn't figured you for the domestic type," he muttered. His usually velvety voice was gravelly with sleep, but still made me tremble.

"Cooking is my only domestic talent," I smiled. Squinting, Edward smiled crookedly in return, and I felt myself blushing. I cast about for something to get the rumpled Adonis out of my kitchen so I could concentrate and stop hearing innuendos in everything that come out of my mouth.

"Why don't you take a shower, it'll make you feel better," I said. Edward nodded. I told him where to get a towel, and he ambled off, coffee mug in hand.

This story is full of humor, even if that wasn’t what the author was aiming for. It can get angsty with occasional side of fluff. There is love and heartbreak. Probably the most worldly fic I’ve read, and since we all know writing is an art form I must say that farkle is an artist in more than one sense.

As always, please read and review!

Until next time, Mr. Boody

Miss Scarlet finds out about Bella's Hymen Theory by SwanCullen12!

I originally had another story I was going to tell you about but yesterday I was fic diving and came across one of the funniest stories I have read in a long time.

"You know, I have a theory about why Eric cheated on me."

Looking down at Bella's tear-stained face, Edward mentally braced himself for what's to come. His housemate had indeed a tendency to dwell too much on subjects that needn't be taken seriously. In his opinion, Eric actually did Bella a favor. Then again, that's his opinion and he's thinking like a man. To a woman in love, getting cheated on was like a million slaps in the face."And what is that?" A question he regretted the minute the first word emerged from his mouth. Do not encourage her to expound on that you idiot!

"It has everything to do with my unbroken hymen,"

*laughs* Hymens. All women have them and it is a right of passage to get rid of it. But in Bella's Hymen Theory by SwanCullen12, Bella takes the hymen to the next level. To an intellectual level. And of course who does she want to test this theory with? Edward Cullen.

This story had me laughing my behind off the chair. Between Edward's inner conversations with Anthony, or in better terms, his penis and Bella's over analytical way not be a virgin anymore, you'll be laughing right along with me.

But what lies under all this humor is the fact that these roomates who have been living together for 3 years and basically are best friends, fall in love. Or at least Edward does. This is basically a story of Boy lives with Girl, Girl wants Boy to deflower her, Boy realizes he's been in love with Girl since they've met. A sweet hilarious love story.

Look what happens when Bella meets Anthony for the first time.

"Oh my God!"

Shitshitshitshit. Too fucking late.

He cringed seeing Bella looking at him in shock. Specifically, looking at the tent under his shorts in shock.

Anthony twitched in acknowledgment. Cocky bastard.

"Is that...is that your penis?" She actually pointed at Anthony who twitched some more.

The fucker is showing off. I no longer have the power over my own dick. Anthony owned me.

"Quiddich Edward, that looked...hard."

Duh.

"And huge."

And there you go. Cue in the blushes. Edward's face, neck and ears were bright red. Anthony throbbed and wouldn't stop twitching. The preening peen. The cocky cock. And you're thinking this why again Edward?

"Well not that I've seen a covered penis this close before. It just looked really big. Bulging and big," Bella continued tilting her head to the side to probably check it some more. She leaned a little closer, clueless to the fact that the move made her breasts sway and the cleavage more pronounced.

Anthony's more determined now to get out of the shorts and be free.

"It kept on moving," the ever observant Virgin stated looking thoroughly confused, "Why is it moving that way Edward? If it's a person I'd say he's having seizures." Pause. "Is it possible for a penis to have seizures? Is there such thing as Penile Convulsions?"

Edward covered his face with both of his hands and lay down the bed. Oh God. This is not happening.

"Of course not idiot, it's only a part of a person Bella. The person has to be the one having the seizures not his genitalia. Sheesh, for a smart woman how can you be this stupid sometimes?"

She's talking to herself now. He groaned. She's just a breath away from over contemplating and God knows what she'll come up then. "Bella? Please shut up."

Silence.

Edward removed his hands from his face and peeked at the suddenly quiet woman standing a few feet away. She's still there, just looking a bit uncertain for some reason. He went back to sitting. "Hey. You okay?"

She bit her lip and nodded but did not say anything. Instead, she resorted to wringing her hands and avoiding his eyes.

"What is it Bella? Come on, you can tell me anything."

"It's a question."

"Then ask away."

"A question that will make you do something."

"Like answer your question." This is getting a bit ridiculous.

"No. Yes," Bella sighed, "I mean yes answering my question is an action by itself but it's not what you'll do. I mean of course you'll do answer my question and that's...sheesh."

"Just say it Bella. Out loud, without the confusing chatter. Just blurt it out. Come on. You can do it."

Deep breath. "Can I see it? Without the cover?"

"See what without the cover?"

"Your penis."

Fuck.

If Anthony had hands, he would be clapping.

If Anthony had a voice, he would yell Hell Yeah.

But what Anthony had was head and body of sorts so all he could do was twitch. And twitch some more. The fucker's nodding vigorously in enthusiasm.

"You can say no Edward. Promise, I won't take it personally and get hurt," Bella assured him quickly, "I just haven't seen one and I'm curious. I mean, inevitably I'll see yours when we do it and some other man's as well- in the future -after I get rid of my virginity 'coz I'll be having sex then with others. Actually, I was even able to graze Eric's once. Completely by accident believe me. And what I grazed, it didn't feel big. I actually thought it was just the zipper if he didn't joke about it. So you know-."

"Bella, I don't want to appear rude but I just have to interrupt your babbling. I'd rather not hear about some man's genitals specially Yorkie's," Edward cut in snorting then stood up, "Fine. You want to see a real live penis. Here's one."

He pulled down his shorts and even if he's thoroughly uncomfortable, he resigned himself to just do this show and tell. For Bella. He'd rather do this with her instead of her with another man who could take advantage of the situation. So he kicked away his shorts and briefs that pooled on his feet and walked closer to Bella without actually touching.

Bella's eyes widened and her jaw dropped as her eyes automatically focused on Edward's genitals. He's circumcised, all smooth-looking without the excess skin although a bit veiny and really big (long as well, Benedict Arnold added excitedly, around eight to nine inches, perhaps even ten?) Bella rolled her eyes at her now awake traitor brain and ignored its perverted guessing of Edward's size. Her eyes strayed to the two proportionate-to-his-penis-and-heavy-looking balls. Ask Edward about tea bagging that Jessica proclaimed she's a master of Bella. Come on!

There's no way in Satan's abode she'll ask Edward about that! That's what Google and Wikipedia are for so just shut the frankfurter up!

Mrs. Peacock has A Tale of Two Cites for you guys by TruceOver!

Rule of thumb for me? I don’t read Slash. I’ve been known to write it, on occasion, but it’s not normally my forte. Not that I don’t like it, I just usually don’t read a lot of it. I started reading this story called A Tale of Two Cities by TruceOver, and found myself…flustered. At a slash story. An Emmett/Edward slash story. This story progresses at a beautiful pace, and the characters are written very well. Generally, my problem with slash stems from the fact that the men are sometimes…feminized and I don’t like that. But not here. The characters are actually very canon, and it’s very refreshing.

The first meeting between these two is just…I found myself going ‘aww’ at random moments.

It's amazing what you can learn about someone at the airport if you're paying attention.

What they like to read, how they take their coffee, if they are an over packer. I always enjoy people watching, especially at the airport.

It's my lack of watching though, that leads me to him. I'm on my phone sending a text when I turn the corner, and run right into him. I collide with his tall, hard, and very attractive body.

I immediately back up when I realize what I've done, my backward steps putting space between us, but not enough that I can't feel his breath on my face.

All I see is green.

Deep and beautiful, with a touch of sadness and a bit of anger, his eyes are captivating.

After a few moments, I take a step forward, bringing myself closer instead of the farther away like someone normally would. I can't help it. All I want to be is closer.

Isn’t that just…aww? The gist of the story is that these two fly in and out of Seattle on a weekly basis for business, and often meet each other on the plane. At first it’s just a mild attraction, but the two are drawn to each other and can’t stay away. Edward is a bit reluctant at first, with Emmett unsure of how he’s been received. But Edward has his reasons and Emmett is persistent, so it works out nicely.

And the intimacy? *fans self*

He's kissing me.

The kiss is sudden; his lips are on mine before I know it, and they're soft and forceful. His hand is on the back of my neck, pulling me closer, and I don't fight it. After a few seconds he parts his lips and I feel the warmth of his breath in my mouth, followed by his soft, wet tongue. We stand there perfectly still except for our tongues and our lips, which are having a conversation all their own.

He kisses me with urgency, with need. He deepens it and I let him because God, I need it too. His fingers curl up into my hair and he moans and it takes everything in me not to push him up against the elevator wall.

It's intense.

This story is a love story, and it’s beautiful. It has depth, and intimacy-not just smut-and a wonderful plot. It’s a delicious mix, and I recommend it to anyone who enjoys slash, and to those that are curious about it.

Mr. Green has a Scarlet moment with Archery24!

From time to time, I like to read an action fanfiction, mostly to try and get rid of the angst in my system. Archery24 is one of my favorite action writers. She is the author of Scarlet.

Here’s the summary: Bella is the greatest thief the world's never seen; she is only recognized by her scarlet calling card. Edward is FBI, and has been able to catch every criminal he's come across. Little do they know, they are both about to meet their match.

I love the tension between Edward and Bella at the starts. Edward was so determine on catching Bella, while Bella is so sure of herself that she was better than the cop who was trying to catch her.

Once they collided, it was obvious that there was no turning back, however, cop and a thief together that sound odd, right? But who in their right mind would deny Edward and Bella their love? In the end, will both of them listen to what their hearts say or will they listen to their heads?

I’ve had the chance to catch up with Archery24, and it was a pleasure getting an opportunity to interview someone like her.

Mr. Green: How did you found out about fanfiction?

Archery24: I first found out about fanfiction about a month before Breaking Dawn was released. I had just read through all of the first three books in a row and was desperately looking for something to tide me over until the next book. I ended up stumbling upon fanfiction and immediately fell in love with all of the stories that were written for Twilight. I would spend hours staring at my computer screen, completely enthralled by some of the stories that I found.

Mr. Green: What are you top five favorite FFn?

Archery24: I’ve read a lot of good stories, some of the ones that are my favorites or have caught my eye would definitely have to be “Bella Swan: Kidnapper”, “Such Great Heights”, “Tropic of Virgo”, “The Hostage” and “Dangerous Affections.”

Mr. Green: You seem to be into the 'action' genre, any particular reason?

Archery24: Leaving the reader in suspense in at least one part of each chapter makes the story more exhilarating. I watch a lot of shows that are about spies and espionage and I always thought it would be fun to combine those aspects along with romance. Why have Bella and Edward simply having a conversation when they could be doing the same thing during a high speed chase in a really expensive car while dodging bullets? It’s not that I don’t love the Bella in the Twilight saga, I just think it’s more fun to write her as a character that likes to kick ass.

Mr. Green: Are you a Team Edward, Team Carlisle, Team Emmett or Team Jacob? LOL!

Archery24: Team Edward. No exceptions.

Mr. Green: Is Scarlet ending soon? If so, do you have the next project lined up?

Archery24: We’re definitely heading into the final sprint with Scarlet. I’m not sure how many more chapters it will take to write out the ending I’ve got in mind, but the finale is fast approaching. In terms of another project, I’m always getting hit with tons of ideas (whether any of them are any good however is another matter altogether). For one of my ideas to get turned into a story it has to really have enough substance for me to be able to expand it. Otherwise, I start writing something really exciting…and then I’m stuck with no idea where to go. So I’ll start with something simple and see if grows, if it does than I really can’t help but write it. As for now however, I’m mainly concentrating on wrapping up Scarlet well and I’ll think about the next project more when I’m done.

Mr. Green: What is your favorite swear word?

Archery24: I think it would have to be “damn”, it’s more flexible to different situations. It’s especially fun to say sarcastically to someone.

Mr. Green: I can always see Scarlet or Guardian Agent in film. Have you ever think about maybe, writing a script for them?

Archery24: Seeing Scarlet or Guardian Agent as a film would definitely be awesome, no arguments here. It has crossed my mind once or twice, but I have to say I think I prefer writing the way I do now. When writing a script, you’re leaving it up to other people like the director to make your story come to life. When you write a story, however, you the writer are in charge of directing, producing, casting, etc, and it’s really all your work and ideas that make the final product.

Mr. Green: In Scarlet, is there more shitz that are going to hit the fan?

Archery24: *laughs* You haven’t seen anything yet.

Mr. Green: Are there moments, concerning your stories, where you want to squeal?? (eg. Getting a review from your favorite author)

Archery24: I gotta say, I don’t squeal very often; but what does blow me away is when I find people talking about my story outside of fanfiction. I sometimes will come across another website where I find people having discussions about my story or recommending it to other people. That really makes me smile to know that people are enjoying my stories and that something about it makes them want to discuss what they’ve read.

Mr. Green: What is your favorite Pop-Tart flavor?

Archery24: I don’t eat Pop-Tarts very often, but when I do I usually either choose the strawberry ones or the brown sugar ones.

Mean Mrs. Mustard goes to The Wedding Party by Spanglemaker9!

A while ago I was looking for something new to read, and I consider myself hard to please. One of the authors I respect and follow on twitter tweeted about an update to a story called The Wedding Party and I was intrigued. I had heard of the author, the wonderful Spanglemaker9 and had been meaning to check out her work, but I just hadn’t had a chance.

Lo and behold, the perfect chance fell into my lap and from the first chapter of TWP I was hooked. I mean, absolutely fucking addicted to this story.

TWP tells the story of Maid of Honor Bella, who lives in Seattle with her boyfriend Jay who she is growing apart from, and Best Man Edward, who lives in Manhattan and is struggling to decide what direction his life should go. They meet in December, in Chicago, at the wedding of their mutual best friends, Alice and Jasper, and sparks immediately fly. Edward and Bella are like two magnets attracted to each other, though they know they shouldn’t be.

The best thing about Spanglemaker9’s Edward and Bella is that they are completely realistic. Bella has never had the most self confidence and during college her father passed away and she relied on her boyfriend Jay. Eventually they just moved in together because it was part of their natural progression, but it never felt right for Bella. She doesn’t particularly love her job, her personal life is rocky at best and none of her friends live near her. She’s alone and doesn’t know how to get out of the rut, but she is determined to do something… especially when she meets Edward.

Edward is finishing his residency at a prestigious hospital in Manhattan and his next logical step is to be offered a full time position, which is just basically his according to the doctors around him. His romantic life is non-existent and he too is feeling lonely, even with his hospital friends he still pines for his life back in Chicago, but he struggles with what is expected of him – which is the be the next star doctor in Manhattan.

Of course, meeting at the wedding changes everything for them.

"Sorry I'm late. I had to check in at work."

Jasper smiled and stood up, speaking to the newcomer still behind me, "No worries. You know almost everyone here already anyway. I think the only real stranger in the wedding party is Bella, the Maid of Honor."

Jasper indicated me with his hand as his friend rounded the head of the table to take his chair across from me. I looked up to say hello and my voice died in my throat.

The man from the airport. The smile and the salute. Oh, God.

I felt the smile fall from my face and my cheeks flush. He stopped in his tracks, his gorgeous, harried smile vanishing from his face as well as our eyes met. Judging from the way he was looking at me, he remembered me, too. I felt a tiny flush of satisfaction along with the overwhelming embarrassment. We were spending the whole weekend together and we'd just been eyeing each other shamelessly at the airport. This was going to be seriously awkward. Scratch that; it already was seriously awkward.

Jasper's eyes cut from me, to his friend, and then back to me, seeming to pick up on the tension. Well, who wouldn't? We were just staring at each other like morons.

"Um…" Jasper began tentatively, "Bella Swan, this is Edward Cullen, my roommate from Dartmouth. Edward, this is Bella, Alice's friend from back home."

He snapped out of it and arranged his face back into a pleasant smile, leaning forward across the table and extending his hand to me. I leaned forward and reached out to take it. His large, warm hand curled around mine, and I felt a shot of heat travel all the way up my arm. Christ, it really had been too long since I'd been properly touched by a man if a simple handshake from Jasper's friend was rendering me weak in the knees. Good thing I was sitting down.

I released his hand almost immediately and smiled slightly at him.

"Nice to meet you, Edward," I said.

"Nice to meet you, too…Bella," he murmured, lowering himself into his chair across from me. I looked down at my hands while Alice and Jasper had a quick, whispered discussion about who was going to do the talking.

Of all the dumb luck. A huge airport like O'Hare, a huge city like Chicago, and the one guy I was shamelessly checking out at the airport winds up being the goddamned Best Man. How was I ever going to look him in the eye without blushing? Because from the look on his face when he saw me, I was sure he remembered that moment...that connection. I chanced a glance back up at him and he was still looking at me, his gaze so intense it made me catch my breath. I met his eyes for just a little too long before I tore my eyes away to look at Alice. This was nothing but trouble.

Oh but it’s the most delicious kind of trouble. Edward spends his time in Chicago trying to figure out Bella while pining away for her. On the other hand, Bella tries to fight her burgeoning feelings for Edward, all the while feeling conflicted and confused about her life back home in Seattle.

This story starts by going through the regular wedding party events, the rehearsal dinner, bachelor and bachelorette parties etc… However, regardless of the name of the story; it’s everything that happens AFTER the actual wedding, that really draws you into the story. Sure, the UST between Edward and Bella is palpable and you’re just dying for a kiss, a hair sniff or a dry hump… anything! You root for these two from the word go and want to see them together, but the course of true love never did run smoothly and this is one story that stays true to that idiom.

The knock on my door, just to my left, was soft, barely a tap. But it echoed through the room like a gunshot, making me jump. I turned to stare at the door, knowing exactly who it was and what would happen if I opened it. I didn't ever really decide to do it. I never truly made up my mind. It was like there was never any choice to be made in the first place. The instant I knew he was on the other side of that door, I knew there was no way I could resist opening it. And I knew exactly what would happen once I did. Before I could stop to think it through, my hand reached out on its own, closing around the brushed steel handle and depressing it. The lock clicked and the door opened in towards me, letting in a shaft of light from the hall. I stepped forward into the narrow opening.

Edward was there, filling the opening, one hand gripping the frame hard, his knuckles white. His head was bowed and he wasn't looking at me. His hair was a mess, no longer tame and tidy like it had been earlier. It looked like he'd been raking it ceaselessly with his fingers. Or maybe that was from my fingers earlier. His right palm rested flat against my door, but he wasn't pushing on it, he wasn't forcing his way inside. He looked full of barely restrained emotion, like one tiny change in the atmosphere around him would cause him to explode.

When he finally spoke, his voice was low, a ragged rumble from deep in his chest. "I know it's wrong…and that I have no right to ask you…but please, Bella…"

He released the doorframe and his hand dropped to my hip, pulling me gently.

And I let him. I let him lead my body forward one unsteady step until he was just a breath away from me. He leaned forward, resting his forehead against mine. His eyes were squeezed shut. "Please," he whispered, "just give me tonight. Let me have tonight with you, Bella." 

Seriously… how can you turn that down? Hell, he’s a fictional character and I’d do very naughty things to him all night long. You can have me TWP Edward. Go read it… you will love me for it.

Mr. Boody gets Voiceless by Kitty Cullen-03!

Good morning, afternoon, or evening. Hope you all are well and will continue to join us here this week at P.I.C.

Two canon recs in a row? Say it ain’t say, Mr. Boody. ‘Tis, ‘tis.

This week the story I’m bringing you all is only four chapters in, so this maybe short, however, I still urge you all to run and read Voiceless by Kitty Cullen-03.

Voiceless is about a young woman who was picked up by the police, wandering the woods. When they found her she wouldn’t, couldn’t, speak. She was admitted into the hospital and at the start of the story had been there for five year – never uttering a word.

Doe, Jane

Police officers found her wandering out of the woods, clearly distressed. Appearance indicated that she had been there several days. Officers attempted to discover what had happened, victim wouldn't speak. She had no ID on her. After an unsuccessful attempt to get a statement, law enforcement officials determined that she may be a danger to herself. Victim was brought here on April 21st, 2005. Age was estimated to be 17-18 years.

Issues/Complications: Mute.

Five years. Jane Doe, as they called her, had been here for five years, and nobody had managed to discover a single thing about her. No name, nothing about her past, not a single word. The hospital called me in because I had handled a similar case in the past, and they thought that perhaps I could do this young woman some good. I wouldn't know if there was a chance of that until I got in to see her. It was only a few minutes later when, who I assumed was the Attendant, came out to greet me.

The excerpt above is from Dr. Cullen’s point of view. Which Doctor Cullen you ask? Edward, of course; he is Jane Doe’s doctor and a mighty smart one I might add. He goes through, and still is I presume, different therapies with her trying to find out something, anything, to help her speak.

He even brings in another specialist to assess, advice, and practice.

Dr. Alice Brandon. Alice, much like Jane Doe can’t remember a thing about her past and helping people remember is her specialty. What I like most about this story is that there seems to be more than one actual tale to be told. I do hope we get to learn more about Alice and maybe even get to eventually get a glimpse at what she went through.

It is obvious that Kitty Cullen-03 has done her research in writing this story. If not, she sure makes it sound good. So far, the techniques Edward and Alice have tried have been productive and excited to read. I definitely look forward to seeing more of them.

Now, Jane Doe. Her POV is my favorite to read because it is entirely mental dialogue. She can’t speak, obviously, so everything you get from her is thought and oh what fun thoughts she has. She’s instantly attracted to her hot new therapist and seclusion hasn’t done anything to calm her hormones. I hope we get to see lots of sexual tension in this fic because I have a feeling that that is where it’s leading.

I blame his hair on these inappropriate thoughts. It was there, perched on the top of his head, looking like it had been molested by his pillow and loving every second of it. Lucky pillow.

He was still grinning like an idiot when he let go of my hand, and a part of me was glad that he was as pleased as I was. I was pretty sure I wanted him to say my name again. Funny how I could remember my name. Wonder why that is? Now that he got my name out of me, I wondered what other tricks he had up his sleeve. I wasn't surprised in the slightest when he pulled out a dictionary. I groaned-internally of course. He was gonna make me communicate. I couldn't very well argue with him, he knew I could point out words now. I gave him my 'I know what you're up to' look, and he laughed again.

Anyone who has read anything by this author before knows she doesn’t normally do canon work. I commend her for branching out and giving a tiny piece of heaven to the canon world. I ask that you stop by and leave this Jasper girl some love. This story is well written, thought out, and highly entertaining.

As always, please read and review.

Until next time, Mr. Boody