Mrs. White reads Slip, Trip and Kiss Me by MzBionic!

Wow! It feels like forever since I've been here! I mean, it hasn't been that long, but long enough. You know me...once I get used to having something on a regular basis, I need to keep having it. Too bad Mr. White didn't know that, but luckily Neighbor Guy does... Which reminds me, did you all cast your ballots and try to guess who's who here on PIC? All those interviews were fun, and I learned some new things, so I hope you did, too. I'm sure you'll never guess who my alter ego is, not that you'd particularly want to. I mean, I'm all kinds of fun, right?

So lately, since I've been busy and the herd of children had spring break recently, I've slacked off on my reading responsibilities. Lucky for me, I'm a member of a group on Facebook, and over 40 of the writers there just posted a ton of stories, most of then o/s's so I can sit down and enjoy them while the kids bang on the locked front door. What? It's nice outside, and they have juices and goldfish crackers, it's all good. The FanFicAholics Anonymous FB group is made up of all kinds of incredible writers, and they recently held their FicAwesome Gift Exchange 2, so of course I headed right over to see what there was to read. It's incredible...so many great stories. I haven't been this happy since that time when I'd bought a new hot pink corset and matching thong and Neighbor Guy and his friend came over with some oils and... Well, you get the picture.

One of the first stories I read was written for a friend of mine, Dolphin62598. I was so excited, I couldn't stay away.

Slip, Trip, and Kiss Me, by MzBionic is a story about a birthday girl Bella and her night out with friends. After winning concert tickets on a local radio show, Alice announces to the world that she'll be taking along her birthday girl-best friend Bella. What's even better than a free concert with friends on your big day? Maybe hanging in the VIP room of the venue with the three hot guys from the radio show where you just won your tickets. Alice is overly excited to finally meet Jasper, and Bella just wants to see the concert. Imagine her surprise when Masen, the cocky, overconfident, hottie radio host is there and making a play for her. With four girls and three guys, how it will all end up? Will Bella be able to last the night in the almost non-existent clothes Alice has picked out for her? Is Masen really as sure of himself as he seems? And hey, is that two Edward's, with one going by the name Rob???

Slip, Trip, and Kiss Me is a very cute story that is full of snark and fun. Things even get a little hot and sexy, which I always love. And what's better than this great little o/s? How about the fact that the author just might be working on a smut filled second chapter? Come on, you know you love that. I loved this story, finding myself laughing at all the exchanges between our birthday girl and her would be suitor. It was a fun read and well done, and I can't wait to see what else the author has planned. Don't try to deny it...you know you can't resist a good VIP room groping, now can you???

I'm off to go read a few more FAGE2 stories. There's so much goodness there, and it's awesome...reading stories written for someone else... So nice. :) Oh hey, don't forget to guess who the PIC's are, it's fun and there might even be a prize in it for you. No, it's not a night with me, though that would be an awesome prize, let me tell you what. Oh, and Mr. Green, just so you know, I have that value pack of glow in the dark green condoms that you left here on St. Patrick's Day. Oh, and some pictures. Just sayin'... :) Hope you don't slip and trip on your way over here to pick up the last few that we didn't use. But maybe if you wear that “Kiss Me, I'm Irish” shirt again...I will.

*****

I slammed down the drink Masen had gotten me and asked him for another with side shot of Jack. He didn't argue and called a waitress over.

"Hey sexy, the birthday girl over here needs some more alcohol. Think you could hook us up?"

Of fuckin' course he ended that with a wink and a smile. He was such a pig, but I have to admit it worked. She brought us two shot glasses, a bottle of Jack and some cokes for chasing.

The smile on my face when I picked up the bottle of Jack must have made Masen think he had done something right because he started scooting closer to me on the couch.

"And just what the fuck do you think you're doing Eddie Boy? Just because I'm the birthday girl doesn't mean you'll be getting to see my birthday suit tonight."

Why had I never used this birthday thing to my advantage before?

But now that for all intents and purposes he had shown his hand, this could be very fun. I gave him a wink and went back to pouring shots for us.

"Cheers to the only thing going down my throat tonight!" And with that I slammed my shot back and poured another. When I went to pour another for Masen, he was slack jawed and staring at me like I had five heads.

Well maybe he didn't need more alcohol. I grabbed his shot glass, swallowed down the amber liquid and finished by licking my lips to get the last little bits.

As I went to pour another shot into his glass, his hand shot out and grabbed my wrist.

"Don't you think that maybe you should slow down there. You don't want anyone taking advantage of you."

He scooted closer, almost whispering into my ear, "and I don't want anyone else getting the chance to see that birthday suit of yours. If I can't, no one will."

Mrs. White: How did you get started in fan fic?

MzBionic: My sister used to write for Nsync when we were teenagers and I beta’d for her… after reading Twilight she told me to go check a few fics out.

MW: What’s the first story you read?

MB: Wide Awake by AngstGoddess003 and it’s still the best fic I have ever read.

MW: What’s your favorite fan fic story and why?

MB: I have a few favorites but I’d have to say that my favorite is Hands Open by Nikita2009 because I can relate to that Bella.

MW: How did you come up with the idea for your story/stories?

MB: Well Danza was the result of drunken chatting with MinnaKoda and her forays into the land of Urban Dictionary… I write a collab with Robicorn all about Elvisward and that is because my god daughter loves Lilo & Stitch… Slip, Trip & Kiss Me was a FAGE entry and I did a bit of lurking and found out that my recipient loved Seether.

MW: Who is your favorite character to write?

MB: Emmett for sure.

MW: How did you meet and get your beta?

MB: Well DandieGoose is muh masta beta (because if I didn’t have her all of my fics would look like that wonderful sentence) and I met her through the wonderful group of Chatzy Ladies. When she’s not available SueBee helps me out and I love her for it :-D

MW: How does it make you feel when people gush over you and your stories?

MB: It makes me amazing. I’ve never been a writer. I went through school getting 4’s and 4.5’s on my essays, never getting A’s because I’m not a detailed writer. It makes me feel like I am good at something that is outside of my comfort zone and because of that I feel like I can do anything.

MW: Which Twilight saga book is your favorite? And what’s your opinion on Breaking Dawn?

MB: I’d have to say that Eclipse was my favorite book. Breaking Dawn, in my opinion, shouldn’t have been the end and definitely feels like it was crammed into one book. There were so many questions I had afterwards. I’m also very scared for the movie… I really don’t want to hate it.

MW: If you could give one piece of advice to a new author, what would it be?

MB: Definitely have a beta or pre-reader that you can use as a sounding board… without my two amazing ladies I’d be lost.

MW: What is your favorite part about fan fic and the Twilight fandom?

MB: My favorite part about fanfic is that I don’t get cock blocked ::coughStephenieMeyercough:: and the fandom is filled with amazing women.., and some catty ones too, but hey, what kind of life would it be if there was absolutely no drama?

MW: What is your favorite ALMOST curse word?

MB: Shiz.

MW: If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

MB: Well considering all my friends are going to hell… I probably wouldn’t end up in heaven… but if somehow that happens I’d like to hear God say, “Welcome to the party! Porn to the right, alcohol to the left.” Bwahah I’m such a dirty h00r.


Randomness with Mrs. White

MW: If you were in a beauty pageant, what would your talent be?

MB: Singing or rearranging furniture (yes it’s a Miss Congeniality reference)

MW: What’s your favorite drink?

MB: Alcoholic: whiskey & diet Non-Alcoholic: water

MW: If you could make smexy times with any character from one of your stories, who would it be and why?

MB: Danzmett… oh yea. He’s snarky, full of humor and apparently has an amazing tongue ::drools::

MW: Have you ever sung karaoke?

MB: Yes, I even posted a video of me drunkenly singing for Jo (the amazing author of Edward Cullen: Dick for Hire)

MW: Which Disney Princess most closely resembles you and why?

MB: Belle. I have brown hair and eyes and I’m a total book worm/nerd.

MW: Do you ever use any people from real life in your stories? If so, who and how did you choose them?

MB: Yes, actually. I’ve used my friends: Leah, Sarah and Zach… I just used some of their characteristics and/or mannerisms. And I used some of Sarah’s favorite words :-D

MW: If you could move anywhere, where would it be?

MB: Anywhere but here. Florida sucks. Don’t move here. I’d probably end up either in NYC, Cali or Canada. Odd choices I know but there are reasons.

MW: Do you listen to music while you write? Does music inspire your stories in any way?

MB: I listen to music 24/7. I can’t concentrate if I don’t have background noise. Funny story is that when I was writing this particular fic I listened to Seether’s cover of Careless Whisper over and over until I got the dancing scene perfect.

MW: What’s your favorite movie?

MB: Booty Call ::bwahah:: and Black Beauty.

MW: Were you involved in any extra curricular activities while growing up?

MB: Choir, Drama, Math tutoring, Student Government, Soccer, Volleyball, Soccer and Softball… I was a good kid. Wonder what happened?

MW: Who is your celebrity crush?

MB: Kellan Lutz and Natalie Portman.

MW: What’s your favorite item on a relish/vegetable tray?

MB: Tomato with cucumbers as a close second.

MW: Have you ever been skiing?

MB: Water skiing has happened… not for long because I have absolutely no balance.

MW: How did you choose your pen name/username?

MB: I didn’t really get into the fandom completely (reviewing, getting an AU FB, talking to other readers/writers) until after my car accident in July. MzBionic is a play on the bionic woman because I now have titanium plates, screws and pins in my body.

MW: What’s your favorite cookie? 

MB: White chocolate macadamia nut for sure!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KITTY CULLEN_03! (@Kitty_Cullen)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY 

KITTY CULLEN 03

Maitressesaint

We’ve been FEMMES, PICs… EPIC and, DARLIN, we’ve been HOE’s. No matter where life takes us our friendship will CONTINUE and you will remain the Jasper to my Edward, the Elena to my Katherine, the Ness to my Bella, and the Damon to my Bonnie because without you none of it would have been as special (or fun).

Whether you’re deleting my commas or listening to me vent, I know it’s out of love. I couldn’t, and wouldn’t want to, ask for a truer friend.

Happy Birthday KC!

Happy Birthday to You! By Marianne Richmond

Open your eyes. Get ready to play. From morning ‘til night, this is your day. What will you do? What fun will you plan? What memories will make your birthday grand?

“Cake for breakfast!” you say with glee, “served a’ la mode, with chocolate milk of course, or soda pop instead!”

Dance in your pajamas. Sing a silly song.

Bring cookies to your neighbors. Smile all day long!

Buy yourself some flowers. Throw confetti while you walk.

Decorate your driveway with multi-colored chalk.

“A party would be fabulous,” you say, “for two or ten, or twenty. Would it be okay if I hoped for presents plenty?”

Hope for all you want today. Wish for dreams come true. No one is more deserving than fantastic, awesome you!

Choose your favorite clothes and wear ‘em all together. Parade around the town, no matter what the weather.

Blow up red and orange balloons and launch them to and fro, brightening up the sky above for your birthday down below.

“I’ll do a kartwheel in my kitchen for every year of me.” Then you say, “I think I may go on a chocolate spree!”

Fill your tum with tasty treats for no reason but because… you’re the only you there is, and that deserves applause!

“Do I look a little taller?” You ask with proud delight. “Is my brain a little smarter since the mid of yesternight? Can everybody figure with a simple look and see, that today is the one yearly anniversary of me?”

Your birthday is our chance to share our biggest cheer for who you are inside each day of every year.

Your feelings and ideas, your jokes and sweetest smile. Your hugs and kind affection. Your quirky, perky style.

Count us one by one, the circle of all those who love you and adore you from your head down to your toes.

“I think I need a rest,” you say, “from all the lively fun, to count my many blessings before the day is done…”

Not quite yet, you know, you still have more to do, to share the joy and happiness of simply being you!

Spray your sis with silly string. Give juggling a try.

Find a kiddie playground…

Swing and touch the sky!

Roll down the biggest hill and sprawl out afterward. Feel the thrill of possibility in this big, wide open world.

Make a deal between yourself on the intro date of you, to learn one something different and try another new.

Yes, from morning light to starry night, no matter what you do… Make it joyful, make it fun.

Happy, Happy birthday to you!

Booty492

Happy Birthday, Andrea!

I hope you get some Chinese take-out, have a good fortune…in bed, and drink straight from a bottle of wine like the classy lady you are! Oh, and I can’t forget good tunes…

Lurve,

Mari 

Coldplaywhore

Kitty, I hope you have a stupendous, marvelous and most excellent birthday!
All the best,
-CPW

 Shirley_007

Beegurl13 & Mrs.Robward

TwiOthGirly

I don't think I can really say how much I love you kitty. Like you've been there for me during the good times and the bad. Through all of my insecurities. I can come to you and lay it all on the line and still have your love as a friend. So instead of getting all mushy I'm going to just post your screenshots of birthday wishes! LOVE YOU BABE!

Yvette The Maid wants you all to GUESS THAT P.I.C. NOW!

Guess that P.I.C has officially ended and all of us have been reviewed, interviewed and revealed. Now, it’s time for you, loyal reader, to take a stab at guessing who is who. Of course it would be easiest for us to just tell you which author belongs to which alter ego, but where is the fun in that?

Our reasoning for running this mini contest was to get everyone involved. So tell me… Mean Mrs. Mustard is… WHO? What story does Mr. Boody write? And boss lady… Miss Scarlett, that can’t be anyone else but…

In case you have missed the link on our Twitter, which is @PICffcorner for those of you not following, you can take a guess HERE. This little spreadsheet right HERE.

Don’t be shy. There are wrong answers, but it doesn’t matter. No one will even know you played along. Not even me. :)

Good luck and happy guessing, darlings. I shall see you all soon with an all new GOTW.

Until we meet again,
Yvette

Mean Mrs. Mustard learns about Pride and Professionalism from LeahTheWeary!

I’m a big reader of Edward/Bella fics that are pure fluff but sometimes I get in the mood to read a Dickward/Bella fic. Pride and Professionalism by LeahTheWeary fit the bill. Once I started reading, I couldn’t stop.

Bella is a new legal assistant that just got hired to work at Cullen Law Firm. Bella also works part-time as a waitress at a little Italian restaurant where a lone, mysterious, wine drinking man of her dreams frequents (who she never has the chance to wait on). All of Bella’s dreams are crushed when she finds out that her new boss, Edward Cullen, is the man she’s been lusting over…oh, and he’s a huge dick! Bella shouldn’t want to be attracted to him...

He walked close up to me and stood less than an arm's reach away and I turned to face him. Ugh. He was acting out a pet peeve of mine…people who stand too close in my personal space, but I found myself not minding so much since it was him standing here.

I noticed I only came up to his shoulders, in my high heels, and admired his five o'clock shadow framing his jaw line and oh sweet heaven, he smelled so good…like a walk through the forest after a rain and the slightest hint of musk. My brain was rambling again, as it always seemed to do in his presence.

Although he was as warm as a Sunday afternoon in Antarctica, still, there was something so appealing about him. There was something buried beneath the masquerade of dirty looks and cold glares. I could feel it in my veins.

I looked up, meeting his eyes and he was already staring at me. I started to feel a bit uncomfortable then, wondering how this would look if someone were to walk in.

"Bella, I'm sorry for my accusation last week, regarding Tyler. I realize now you were not the one initiating any kind of inappropriate behavior. The matter has been addressed and I don't foresee there to be any future problems."

So the asshole can apologize. I bit back a grin. His professionalism never seemed to leave him. He never appeared comfortable to just speak freely, always trying to put up a front, I suppose so no lines would be crossed that he is the boss, and I am the employee.

Strictly professional.

He stiffened slightly and took a step back. Why was he always so terse with me? Just when I begin to see the tiniest bit of warmth in those jade eyes, he shuts down and the cold creeps back in.

"Thank you. I appreciate you telling me." His cold expression was back on his face and he took a few more steps backward, crossing his arms. I realized I had inadvertently moved closer to him and now, he sneered at my action.

Why do I repulse him so much?

"I just hope you'll reconsider your wardrobe, especially those shoes." He shocked me yet again.

"What is wrong with my wardrobe and especially my shoes, Mr. Cullen?" I asked, not at all worried about my tone with him this time. His hostility was wearing on me.

"Well for one, your shoes appear to be appropriate attire for a stripper and your skirts seem a bit snug, don't you think?" He spat.

Just when you think that Edward is trying to be nice he pulls out his asshole card. And it continues throughout most of the story. There is a good amount of UST but it is bearable because of the few lemony dreams that are told in Bella’s and Edward’s POV. They do not disappoint at all.

Pride and Professionalism is a great forbidden office affair story that you won’t let you down. LeahtheWeary does a great job keeping you on your toes as Bella and Edward try to keep their relationship a secret around the office. This fic is complete and not a very long read.

Before I sit down with LeahTheWeary to ask a few questions, here’s a teaser of what you can look forward to in the lemon department…

The kiss grew with more heated passion and almost roughly, he picked me up and sat me on the counter, his hands roaming my thighs. Breaking the kiss, he looked down at my exposed thighs, my skirt having ridden up, and he his mouth gaped at my garter belt and thigh high stockings.

"Holy fuck, Isabella…you trying to give me a heart attack?"

Feeling sexy and frisky, I couldn't help but tease.

"Why no, Mr. Cullen, why would you ever think that?" I asked innocently.

His eyes darkened and a much more serious tone fell on his features. "You're a very naughty girl, aren't you Isabella. Very naughty indeed."

He lowered himself, his mouth reaching my thighs and kissed the exposed area above my stockings, parting my knees. His tongue darted out and created a hot, wet line up to my inner thigh, where he gave my delicate skin a light nibble with his teeth.

Go. Read. Enjoy! Don’t forget to review!

Welcome to the PIC interview chair, LeahTheWeary!

MMM: How did you get into fan fiction?

LTW: My obsessive Twilight personality did a Google search on the real Volterra, Italy one day about two years ago, and my results brought up a link to a story on fan fiction. The rest is history.

MMM: Can you remember the first fan fiction you read?

LTW: It was the story in my Google results. I don’t recall the name unfortunately, but I was fascinated that someone was writing a story about my dear Edward and Bella. I couldn’t stop!

MMM: What made you start writing?

LTW: I’ve always enjoyed writing, mostly when I was a teenager while writing strange and dark poetry in my bedroom while listening to Mazzy Star, Lisa Loeb and Sponge (I was a teenager in the nineties for those who may not be aware of such artists). Also, I had to write a book, yes, an actual book, for a Language Arts project in the sixth grade. I wrote one about two best friends who had a falling out. My parents really applauded me over the book, telling me how great of a story it was, but I thought they were just being good parents. I really didn’t see what the big deal was. Anyway, many years later after I read the Twilight series, something stirred in me. Once I discovered fan fiction (on that big Google “accident”) story writing was rekindled.

MMM: Do you get ideas for your stories from real life experiences or just random things that you think about?

LTW: I believe all writing is born from real life experiences and it evolves from that point on. When writing Pride and Professionalism, I retracted back to when I actually worked in an attorney’s office. Trust me though, there was no one even remotely close to as hot as Edward. I think writing is real-life meets “what if”.

MMM: When you’re writing, do you listen to music or have to have silence?

LTW: I enjoy silence. I prefer no one to even be in the same house, which is rare. With poetry, I require the music, but with fiction, I need the silence. Writing dialogue and plot is so different than writing a poem.

MMM: Currently, what is your favorite fan fic?

LTW: Pistols and Petticoats by saltire884. FANTASTIC story. There is not a single boring chapter in this beautiful storyline. It’s complete, too, so go check it out.

MMM: Do you have any fics that you drop everything you are doing to read the update?

LTW: There is one that I would like to drop everything I’m doing, but that doesn’t always happen. That one is Unexpected Circumstances by Savage7289. It’s another great story with good flow and characters. It’s set back in the times of knights and castles, and even if you’re not into that sort of thing, give this one a chance. The author has successfully transported me back in time and it’s so believable.

MMM: Top 5 Fav Fics

LTW: Alright, these are not in order!

The Education of Professor Cullen by sheviking

Pistols and Petticoats by saltire884

The Tutor by ItzMegan73

Ethan Church by dryler

The Plan by QuantumFizzx

MMM: Are there any types of fics you absolutely will not read? Like Jasper/Bella fics.

LTW: I cannot get into slash fics at all. To each their own, but it is not my thing. Since you mentioned different pairings, I must admit that I do enjoy a good ole Bella/Carlisle fic at times. There’s nothing like a sexy older man.

Also, it’s a turn off for me when the author’s notes are terribly haughty, i.e. calling their readers ‘sluts’, ‘bitches’, ‘bi-atches’, etc, no matter what so-called humor is behind it, it just doesn’t settle well with me and then it kinda ruins the enjoyment of reading their story for me. I’m old school and believe in having respect. Sue me.

MMM: I totally agree on the author’s notes. Thank you for stopping by. It was a pleasure having you!

LTW: Okay, so not that exciting, eh? Haha! Thanks so much. That was fun.

Don’t forget about our Guess That P.I.C. contest! Fill out your guesses today!

Guess That P.I.C Week finally comes to an end with Miss Scarlet and HopelessRomanitic79 Crashing Head On!

Welcome to the last and final day of Guess That P.I.C! I know it's been a journey. Lots of things to get through and more like two weeks than one. Anyhoo, moving on. We are closing out the theme with a wonderful writer who isn't a stranger to the PIC world. She actually won judges choice for our first contest way back when with her entry Better Than Fantasy. I am talking about none other than HopelessRomantic79!

In her story Crashing Head On, is about Emmett, he is a college hockey player that got into a horrible car accident. He is looking forward to a lot of time getting better and since his parents really can't stay there and take care of him, in comes Bella. Her and Emmett have known each other for years and for years have hated each other. Bumping heads and all. Bella is kinda dating Edward at the time that Emmett's mother Esme asks Bella to move in with Emmett to help him through recovery. First thing that comes to Bella's and Emmett's mind is hell to the no. But being the nice person that she is, she agrees.

Bella and Emmett haven't seen each other in some time so immediately there is some hatred but there is also some attraction that wasn't there before.

Moments, or perhaps hours later, Swan swooped into the room, carrying a glass of water and some pills.

I groaned at the sight of the pills. They made me so weak, so out of control. I hated taking them, though I knew I had to. I'd regret the pain worse in the long run.

Swan frowned when she heard me groan. "Nice to see you, too, Cullen," she spat out. I frowned right back at her. For being so hot, she sure was a bitch. No matter how many sexual dreams I had about her, and no matter how badly I wished I weren't crippled so I could fuck her silly, I still couldn't control my reaction to her: instantly defensive and equally as harsh.

"Do you want your pills now?" she asked. She wasn't looking at me now. In fact, her eyes were looking everywhere but at me. Her mouth was set hard in a permanent scowl. Bitch.

"Fine," I said curtly. I took the cup of pills from her, and popped them in my mouth all at once, grabbing the glass from her so that some spilled over the side, splashing onto my good leg.

"Sorry," she muttered, and wiped away the droplets with her fingers. They were warm, and I was shocked to realize her touch made my skin tingle oddly where we'd made contact. Weird, I thought, as my heart rate accelerated.

I took a large gulp of water, swallowing the medicine, trying hard not to think about how much I had liked her soft, smooth skin against mine. Not good.

"Are you hungry?" she asked when I set my glass down on my bedside table.

I paused for a moment, thinking about it, trying to figure out if the pangs in my stomach had to do with how she looked in tiny short shorts, or if it was actual hunger. My stomach rumbled slightly, and I knew that it must be physical hunger, and absolutely nothing at all to do with Swan's tempting curves.

"Yeah, I could eat something," I said, choosing not to look at her at all costs.

I epically failed when she turned on her heel and stalked out towards the kitchen. God, her ass looked good…

I groaned, and covered my eyes with my good hand. These thoughts were nearly as bad as my thoughts of my future. Both made me cringe with fear.

I heard a knock at the door. The last thing I wanted was for someone else to see me like this. Go away… I thought to myself.

Bella rushed to the door, and her voice changed instantly.

"Edward, what are you doing here?"

Edward? Who the fuck was Edward?

"I had to see you, Bella. I missed you. Missed your mouth. Missed your sweet little-" His voice was full of arrogance and I could tell he was the kind of guy who just expected women to collapse at his feet with a few carefully chosen (and rehearsed) words.

"Stop it! He's awake!"

My heart sank before I could stop it. She had a boyfriend. And this Edward sounded like a real asshole. I already hated to think of her with him.

And that is just a taste. There is a sponge bath and juicy lemony things to go. I don't want to give it all away to you but lets hear what the woman has to say for herself.

Miss Scarlet: How did you get started in fanfiction?

HopelessRomantic79: When I was a junior in college, my best friend at the time and I were talking about Harry Potter. One day she told me "By the way, you need to read this." I was hooked on HP fic for about a year before I discovered Twilight fic. This was before the movies and there was less than a thousand fics. I even wrote a paper in college for my senior project in Gender, Sex, and the Body class exclusively about fan fiction. Good times. Research was fun. Eventually I was convinced to start writing myself, once I'd graduated college, and the rest was history.

MS: How long have you been with PIC and what do you enjoy most?

HR79: Just a month and a half or so, but I love my friends I already knew on the site, and the people I've met here are awesome too. I love being able to rec fics I find, whether people actually read them or not. I can still be like, "This is amazing, fucking read it now!!!" Haha.

MS: What's your favorite charactization? Ie. Geekward, dilfmett, Doctorward etc?

HR79: So... I write non-canon pretty much 96% of the time. But I am a sucker for an AU Edward... and Doucheward is like, ungh for me. I love it when he's a dick in the beginning and changes... but not into a pussy or anything, just a better person. Like in Bittersweet Symphony. OR, I'm a huge sucker for the whole "friends who turn into more" thing regardless of pairing. AND, I love like, adorably awkward characters. And cops. Men in uniforms. Girls who moan like porn stars. Whatevs. Hahaha. I like it when the pairings aren't like the books, just because I love writers who give the characters equality, unlike SM...

MS: Walk me through your general writing process.

HR79: I get into a writing mood. Like I can't make myself write usually, I have to make sure there are no sounds, no open chats, no Twitter... I have to be in my zone. And it's always at night. Like past midnight. It's kind of obnoxious. I want to write but it's like I can't until I'm half-passed out. I write all the way through, I never write in sections, and I rarely plan out what I'm going to write. Send off to pre-reader/beta... I hardly ever reread it afterwards. Probably a bad plan, but that's how it works for me.

MS: What are your top favorite fics of all time?

HR79: Faking It by spanglemaker9!!!! And Bittersweet Symphony by I'mwiththevampires08!!! Gahhhhhh, those fics are like, my go-to fics for all things UST/sexy. I read those babies over and over, and if BSS doesn't update soon I may die. Just saying. I've got other fics I inhale too, like First & Ten by Nolebucgrl, The Tour by WutheringBites, Aha Shake by TeamBella23, and The Cullen Campaign by belladonna1472. I live for the updates!!!! And there are like a million oneshots I read over and over... you can probably guess why... ;-)

MS: What's your favorite curse word?

HR79: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!

MS: What's your favorite John Hughes movie?

HR79: Ferris Bueller's Day Off!!!!!

MS: If you could kill or maime one Twilight character who would it be, why, and what would be your weapon?

HR79: From the books, I hate Rosalie. And Nessie creeps me out. So.... Both of them. Rosalie is a frigid bitch who doesn't deserve Emmett, and Nessie is the very definition of precosious child, which I hate. Ewwwwwww. So... Rosalie and Nessie, in the conservatory, with the lead pipe. ;-)

MS: Whats your least favorite Fanfiction cliché or pet peeve?

HR79: Over-description. I know I tend to write kind of fast paced and simplisticly, but I don't mind fuller descriptions... so long as they don't go into girly stuff. Like if Alice goes on too many fucking shopping sprees or Emmett decides to describe a woman's outfit in stunning detail. Gross. I hate reading weddings or child births, I hate the words "completing the look" or anything to do with popping Ps... I hate it when characters, like babies in the epilogues are named after Kellan or Jackson or Rob or whatever... and I hate when Edward is compared to looking like Robert Pattinson. Breaks the illusion of the fic.

MS: What draws you to Emmett as a character?

HR79: He's everything thing I'd want in a man. Strong, masculine, fun, easy-going, sexy as hell, never boring, loyal. I hate how fic and SM make him... like this dumb jock with nothing going on upstairs. Give me an Emmett who makes rampant sexual innuendos AND be sarcasticly smart any day.

Plus, have you SEEN Kellan without his shirt on? I mean COME ON. I wasn't really into Emmett until the midnight showing of Twilight........ In. Fucking. Love.

MS: What is your favorite Disney movie?

HR79: I can only pick one??!! The Lion King. Or Robin Hood. I've never been able to decide. I can recite 'em all regardless.

MS: If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

HR79: I hope he sounds like Bob Barker and says "Come on down!!!"

MS: What is your favorite movie quote?

HR79: You had to ask that, didn't you??!! I literally have no clue. "I beg your pardon Madam, but... GET. OFF!!!!" OK that's not it. But still. That's a damn good quote. Who knew The Lion King could sound so dirty??

MS: What is your biggest inspiration? Fanfic wise and other.

HR79: Nora Roberts. Nahh, kidding. I'm not sure. I don't really think about things like that.

MS: If you weren't writing fanfic or participating in the fandom, what would you be doing with your time?

HR79: Literally no idea. I'd say "having a life" but we all know that's not true. I'd probably just read a lot more travel writing like the old days, pre-fic. Working like I am now but getting more sleep. I should really sleep more...

Guess That P.I.C. Week is almost closing but first Mrs. Peacock has some witchy time with wytchwmn75!

So I got the delightful pleasure to sit down with wytchwmn75 this week, even after all of the mess I went through with my computer-I thank her for not beating my behind for the email getting lost.

She’s the author of such stories as 100 Hours ;Bella has a 4.0 GPA & volunteers at the hospital. Edward is pierced & has tattoo's & has to serve 100 hours community service at the hospital. What happens when the bad boy finds out the good girl has a wild side? ExB, AH, OOC, Rated M and Dear Bella ; After being betrayed by the man she thought she loved, Bella vowed to never let anyone in again. Until she met Edward Cullen. Is he truly the perfect man for her, or will he break her heart beyond repair? BxE,AH/AU,OOC,Rated M - both of which I’m reading now, even though I don’t do canon very often. And let me tell you, she’s absolutely a delight to read! She makes me not dislike Edward quite so much, which is no easy task. I definitely suggest you take a look at all of her work, because what I’ve read so far has been absolutely fabulous!!


Mrs Peacock: How did you get started in fanfiction? 

Wytchwmn75: Writing wise I started in January 2010 doing the WitFit Challenges and then I took a leap and posted them on FFn with the support of some authors. Then I started my first story.

MP: How long have you been doing this? Do you remember the first story you ever read? 

WW75: My fanfic anniversary is this month, 2 years ago I stumbled across Scotch, Gin and the New Girl on an IMDb thread and then found Wide Awake, I haven’t looked back. So reading is two years, writing is one.

MP: What are your top favorite fics of all time? Give me 3. 

WW75: Clipped Wings and Inked Armor by Hunterhunting, The Tutor by ItzMegan73 and Wide Awake by angstgoddess

MP: So tell me, why the screen name? 

WW75: I’m Wiccan and when I made my e-mail eons ago it was what I picked but you couldn’t use ‘witch’ so I had to get creative. 75 is my birth year. It’s not creative at all but I remember it which is all that matters, lol.

MP: Favorite thing about being a PIC? 

WW75: The power I yield. Just kidding. It gives me an excuse to read, as if I needed one, but I like to fic dive and try to find ones that aren’t getting as much as attention as they should. I feel like I get to pay it forward.

MP: Whats your least favorite Fanfiction cliché or pet peeve? 

WW75: Haha, well even though it’d be great for Edward to always have a huge dick, I can’t stand that or that Bella comes every time. I kind of thumb my nose at that in 100 Hours.

MP: You write a bit of several pairings, which is great. What’s your favorite? 

WW75: I’m a Bella and Edward girl at heart but I do love Edward and Jasper for non-canon.

MP: If you were dropped in Forks TODAY, would you go to La Push or the Cullens house? 

WW75: Cullen house, I run with the vampires.

MP: You seem to write a lot of AH-why is that? 

WW75: Yeah, I only have one where there are vamps but I guess I’m just more comfortable writing about humans which sounds so mundane but a few of my WitFit’s have vamps in it. I don’t think I necessarily set out to only write AH though. Btw I totally th ink of asshole whenever I see AH.

MP: Purely for my entertainment-tell me a secret. 

WW75: Hmmmm, I do have a lot. But this one shouldn’t get me into too much trouble. Ok so we all know about all the Goddess forsaken snow we’ve had. My sister had just bought a new car and her old one was still parked at the house, she was selling it to a friend. I was backing up so I was in front of her and I totally hit the car. The damage wasn’t too bad and could be blamed on the snow. I wish I had something fabulous to tell.

MP: If you could bring back anyone from history, who would you choose and why? 

WW75: Martin Luther King, I think he was on the verge of totally changing the world in ways that made a lot of people uncomfortable and he could have done so much more with his life and influence. I’ve always been fascinated by him. Mankind really lost a valuable asset when he was killed.

MP: Want to make out? I’m kidding…or am I? 

WW75: Sure, I’ve never kissed a girl but I always wondered…

Guess That P.I.C Week is STILL going strong! Mr. Green plays with Kitty Cullen-03!

Another day of Guess That PIC Week… any ideas who I may or may not be?

What a great week… you all get to meet all the wonderful ladies that I’m trying to woo. Why just this awesome St. Patrick’s Day I had a hot date with none other than the gorgeous beautiful MILF Mrs. White. I believe that St. Patrick’s Day is my fukking favorite day of the year. I can dress in all green and not be stared at like a fukking leprechaun and then all the women are dressed in my favorite color and ripe for the picking. Mrs. White graced me with her fukking presence because her “Neighbor Guy” has been preoccupied lately and she needed some different eye candy. Who was I to disagree?. We started the night off at a local Irish Pub where they served all of my fukking favorites; green apple martinis, green Jell-O shots and of course green fukking tea. Mrs. White then lured me back to her place where she put on her stunning green fukking corset and thong and helped me slip into a green glow in the dark condom. We then proceeded to do very fukking naughty things to one another all night long on her green Persian rug that she pulled out just for me while listening to Al fukking Green. At least that’s what she texted me all night, begging me to come over and fukking join her. We actually did in fact fukking get together earlier that day at a coffee shop to share in a glass of fukking Green tea though. I pried my arm loose from her fukking death grip after she begged me to show her my moves again as we were leaving. She said I changed her fukking life forever… I do what I fukking can that’s for sure.

So I had the privilege to flirt with… I mean sit down with Kitty Cullen-03 and chat about her awesome fic Awake in the Dark and how much she loves me… I mean being a PIC. But before I get to that piece of awesomeness that is our fukking interview, I’ve gotta tell you what you’re missing but not fukking reading the story. Awake in the Dark… wow Kitty has officially popped my non-canon cherry people and in a big fukking way. I have to say that I steer more towards canon and I’ve never reviewed anything that wasn’t an Edward and Bella fic, what can I say I’m sucker for those two fukking lovebirds. But Kitty opened my eyes to the wonderful world of Jasper and Bella loving. Can you say… where have you been all of Mr. Green’s life? Awake in the Dark in the one that I’m choosing to rave about out of all of her wonderful stuff but do go check out more of it please. It’s the one because it’s the one that I want more of, amazing and only 12 chapters in.

Jasper is not your every day average guy in this… he has a very secretive and private life. He is for the lack of a better word- a male prostitute and Bella ends up being one of his clients. She’s out of the norm for his regular clients but he’s not the norm fukking situation now is he. Immediately he is drawn to her and has no idea why. She is magnetic to him and he finds himself feeling different about her from the very beginning. A little fukking taste my lovelies…

"I have three rules. If you are, at any point, uncomfortable with what I'm doing, your safe word is Ranger. You must keep the blindfold on at all times. And when you scream, scream my name-Jasper." There was a reason for this, though I scarcely admitted it to myself. I liked hearing my name. Only mine. It made me feel connected in a way I hadn't felt in years. But there was no need for any of them to know that. She nodded at my words, still chewing her bottom lip. I leaned over and blew out the candle. Number four let out a breath; she felt better in the dark. I thought I would start with getting her accustomed to the feel of my hands before bringing anything else in. I crawled to the edge of the bed to her feet, placing one hand on each of her ankles. I let my hands trail up her legs, slowly, turning them forward and letting my nails scrape her skin every so often. I stayed on the outside of her thighs and progressed upwards to her abdomen. I could hear her murmuring words, but I couldn't understand them. I traced the sides of her breasts-only the sides-and ended by cradling her neck. I repeated the process, only going down the center of her body instead of the outside. This time, I only faintly touched her nipples. She gave a little jerk, acknowledging the feeling. When I reached the apex of her thighs and started to pull her panties off, she pressed them together. "No." I chastised, pulling her thighs apart and yanking her underwear down her legs. I reached for her wetness, immediately rewarded with the soft slickness that showed she was enjoying me. My fingers worked her for a few moments before I decided it was time for me to add to the session. I felt my way off the bed and over to my cabinet, reaching for the toy I thought would prove most enjoyable.

When I made it back to the bed, I straddled her. I had chosen a feather; soft, gentle and enough to drive anyone mad. I would make her cum with this feather. I started at her wrist and inched my way down her arms, her neck and her collarbone enjoying the way she was squirming underneath me. I made swiping motions from left to right across her chest, moving lower with each swipe. I could tell when I hit her nipples; she gasped and bucked against me. I repeated the action again. And again. And again. She was panting and jerking, fevered with need. I finally let up my assault on her breasts as I moved myself and the feather lower down her body. When I reached her hipbone, I repeated the action from above, moving further down until I was near her center. At this point, I had to use my hands to feel out my next move, sliding my fingers into her wet folds to find the right place. Moving the feather back to her breasts, I continued to work my fingers into her until she was arching and mewing for release. I bent down, placed my mouth at her entrance and licked upward-once. My fingers were still inside her and I could feel her clenching unrelentingly around me. "Jasper…Oh…" she cried, almost silent. I stilled, allowing her to ride out her orgasm. When she was finished, I pulled back. I imagined that her pale skin was flushed and she was smiling. I reached for my candle and lighter, because I had to find out.

I was right. And for the first time…I wanted to see her eyes. See if they were still hooded with the high of it all. But that was wrong, and I wouldn't. Reaching forward, I untied her quickly. She wasted no time in sitting up. I made my way to where her bra had landed, and then went to hand it to her. Angela had instructed her of this beforehand; she was to dress. I would guide her to the door. End of story. But when I reached out and grabbed her shoulders to help her up, her mouth opened.

"Wait." Her voice was honey and velvet. Soft. Innocent. But this wasn't part of the bargain. I didn't wait. I pulled on her a little, urging her forward. "Please. I have a question."

"I don't answer questions." I tried again to urge her forward, and this time she complied. When she reached the door, she paused again.

"I just wanted to know why you like the dark." And she was gone.

Mouthwatering right? So good. Makes you wonder what Bella was thinking afterwards. I know that I was curious to find out. Bella is intoxicating in this story. She’s not afraid of anything but seems to be afraid of everything. She’s very quiet and reserved but wants what she wants when she wants it. She just a girl looking for an orgasm without any strings attached… wish I could volunteer for that job.

I still can't figure out what possessed me to sign up with this guy. Perhaps it was just the fact that I hadn't had a good orgasm in…damn. I couldn't even count that far back. So when I overheard some people talking about it, I admit I was curious. There was no way I was going to go and ask them about it because, well…ew, so I went home and did the next most natural thing. I Googled it.

There wasn't anything solid out there, because this guy was so secretive. Nobody knew what he looked like, which lead me to my first What the Hell? Why would anybody in their right mind pay to have sex with someone without knowing what they looked like? But the reviews were pretty spectacular and filled with nothing but praise. Apparently while he…worked his magic…on you, you got a good feel of his body. And apparently it was nice. The whole idea appealed to me because I didn't want to get into some relationship, or take some guy home from the bar or anything like that. I just wanted a good old fashioned orgasm. And one I didn't give myself. So I took a trip down to this building, and knocked like I was a member of some secret society. The girl who answered the door was sweet as hell, and promptly told me that I didn't need to knock. I told her I wanted to know what a session entailed. She pulled me to her desk and perched on the end and started telling me things that this guy could do to me. I asked her politely if I had to have sex with him the first time, or if I could just test out the product before buying the whole cow. She told me of course, that I would need to request no penetration when I set up an appointment, and not to worry because I'd get my jollies anyway. So I said what the hell and set up an appointment.

I'm not going to tell you what it cost me, but I will tell you it was worth every damn dime and then some. This guy was a God among men with those hands of his, and those lips…should be framed and put in the Smithsonian. He didn't say much, though, and I found myself wondering why he wanted to stay hidden, and what made him get into this business, because he'd make some woman a damn happy wife.

I thought I'd take a stab at conversation once all the fun was over, but he wasn't having that. I was dying of curiosity, dying to know what made him hide, but he wasn't up for a Q and A.

Which was why I was going back.

Well, mostly why. Reason number one was because it was damn good. Damn. Good. But that was a close second. And after feeling his nether regions pressed into my abdomen while he did his thing, I decided we'd do the whole 'no penetration' thing again-I needed more prep work.

Friday couldn't come soon enough, and neither could I.

So I sat down with Kitty to talk and get to know her in all the ways a man could want to know a girl… or I hoped to in the beginning. I have to say from the very fukking beginning she didn’t disappoint… I offered her a glass of you fukking guess it green tea and she accepted. She proceeded to add a little bit of sweetness to it and wrapped her sexy lips around the glass. I never wanted to be a cup of tea so bad in all my life… here Kitty Kitty.

Mr. Green: Miss Kitty, Mr. Green is oh so happy he gets the chance to tease you with his tongue. If I'm sweet to you will you purr for me baby?

Kitty: Oh, I’ll purr for you. But leave out the sweet, I like it rough.

Mr. Green: How did you get into Fan Fiction?

Kitty: I got into fanfiction way back with Harry Potter. I started looking for something different and wandered along MuggleNets fanfiction archives, and was hooked. It wasn't long until I found fanfiction.net, and I like that site the best.

Mr. Green: What was the first Fan Fiction you ever read?

Kitty: I honestly have no idea. It’s been so long, and I didn’t used to pay attention to names. I fail.

Mr. Green: Why did you start writing?

Kitty: I started writing because I was like you know what, I can do this shit. So I started off writing my own Draco/Hermione story, which I had up on my profile until recently. I loved it, got better, and never wanted to stop. I've actually Had some really great friends come from fanfiction as a matter of fact, so I'm really pleased I started.

Mr. Green: My new pet Kitty did you know you've taken my virtue? I was never a reader of non-cannon until I was assigned you by the boss lady. So of course then I noticed you have a gravitational field towards writing Jasper and Bella fics so I have to ask, any particular reason?

Kitty: *wiggles my eyebrows* I love stealing virtue. Uh, well, I don't really like Edward. But I don't like wolves. and while reading the books I just kind of gravitated towards Jasper because he's so freaking badass. He's the one that doesn't fit in, and he never really will. And I thought his reaction to Bella was always really interesting, so I thought what would happen if...

Mr. Green: What's something you're reading right now that you can't get enough of? Something that curls your toes and makes you think dirty thoughts... maybe even about me?

Kitty: *snickering* I'm actually becoming a huge fan of TVD (vampire diaries) fics. I'm reading a few on my favorites list that I can't seem to get enough of, but nothing particularly naughty.

Mr. Green: What are your top 5 favorite fics?

Kitty: God almighty. Uh.
A lesson in Release by LillieCullen
Bella Swan: Zombie Killer by Kristen Nicole
Closer, Cold Desert by MariahJILE
Once Bitten, Twice Shy by LifelessLyndsey
Worth the Pain by NCChris

Mr. Green: Is there any type of fic you absolutely can't read? Whether it be for pairing or otherwise?

Kitty: I don't do Carlisle/Bella. I just can't get into it, no matter how hard I try. It's not that I find it gross or bad, but I can't see Carlisle as anything more than a father figure to anyone but Esme.

Mr. Green: What's the proudest moment of your life? And the most squeal inducing moment in your Fan Fiction life? A review or something that just made you go wow, like talking to me?

Kitty: Proudest moment in my life? Hands down having my daughter. My ff life? Right now. *snorts* I'm just kidding. It's hard to pin down. Probably when Cullen818 started reading my stuff. I practically died.

Mr. Green: I’m a huge believer in fate and destiny, where do you stand with it?

Kitty: I'm in complete agreement. If something is going to happen, it will happen

Mr. Green: You’re a PIC, what’s your favorite thing about being one?

Kitty: The girls, easy. Having such a great group of friends to talk to will never get old.

Mr. Green: Least favorite thing about being a PIC?

Kitty: The deadlines. I’m so lazy. I can never keep them. I’m surprised Miss Scarlett hasn’t kicked my ass yet.

Mr. Green: Cause I'm dying to know and it gives me an excuse to talk about me, what's your favorite color Green darlin'? See that I'm learning a bit from you. Bringing out my southern "Jasper" charm just for you *wiggles eyebrows*.

Kitty: *laughs* It was delightful; I'm totally swooning in my britches right now. I like Emerald Green. Pretty, deep...comes from jewels, can't go wrong there!

Mr. Green: I love a good emerald myself darlin’. It’s my birthstone as well, so there’s nothing wrong with that. Thank you so much for sitting down with me, it’s been a blast. Let’s go grab a cocktail and get to the good part. *winks*

Have we teased you fukking enough? Are you ready to go read this amazing story by this hot and sexy fukking author? Do so and enjoy leaving her some fukking love in the process of course, those are your simple fukking instructions for this week. I give the boss lady my piece on a regular basis so I must be doing something fukking right cause this Wednesday I will be back. Hump day with Mr. Green is fukking win in my opinion. Can you wait three fukking days for me again? Well if you can’t come fukking find me, I’m sending the invitation out once again to do so. I’d love to show each and every one of you my tantalizing tongue. You can tell the boss lady that you want me, she might share if you ask fukking nicely. Until next time… keep it fukking Green.

Guess That P.I.C. Week is still going on! Mr. Boody sits down with Beegurl13!

When it was confirmed that PIC was going to pimp out out our fellow bloggers, I was really excited! I'm terribly busy and I never seem to get to read much of what's on my to-be-read list. Well, then somehow I luckily drew Beegurl13 outta of the hat and I may have pumped my fist a few times. She's been on said list for quite a while, long before I even joined PIC. Then I got to looking on her FFn page, and she has quite a few one shots and WIPs. So I stressed over what to read of her’s, I mean I couldn’t actually read them ALL!

The I received an alert for a brand new fic she was posting called The Maiden and the summary was quite interesting: Raised by a Comanche tribe in 1870's Texas, Bella must learn to live
in an ever changing world. What happens when she loses the man she loves, only
to find another man she wants more, but he's married... E/B, M, AH. FAGE2
story written for ZenOneness

I decided this was the one. I've not read many period fics, so it was something all new and fresh to me.
From the very beginning, I knew I'd struck gold...

The warm spring wind blew through the grass on the open Texas plains, bending the long, tan strands every which way. Safely shielded behind a tree stood a boy that could no longer be defined as merely a boy—he was a man. He watched as the brown haired object of his affection carefully waded in the shallow side of the river, filling pouches with water before she began washing the hides she'd carried with her. As the sun shone down over head, her hair glimmered in the light. It was mesmerizing to him, especially the red highlights that flashed every few moments. Her pale skin was such a contrast to his own, that she reminded him of a spirit sent back from the afterlife. Sometimes he really believed she was, with the way she haunted his dreams each night. He loved her, and the nervous feelings in his stomach were overwhelming as he drew in a deep breath and stepped out into the open, waiting for her to notice him.

After several minutes, he could wait no longer, and he quickly walked to the water's edge, careful to keep his distance so that he wouldn't make her uncomfortable.

"Pale Swan?" he softly called. The girl turned quickly around, her light brown eyes wide with surprise.

"Little Wolf," she almost shouted. "You startle me so." She glanced around, looking for one of his brothers, or his younger sisters that she so often cared for. "Are you alone?"

"Yes, but do not worry, I come with news. I hope you find it pleasing."

"News? What kind of news?" she cautiously asked, wondering what he could possibly say to her now that he couldn't have told her just an hour before during their midday meal.

"My brother has delivered six horses to Running Bear, in your honor." Little Wolf waited for her reaction, watching for any showing of emotion that she might give him. Pale Swan was usually quite reserved, never saying much when she visited him in his tipi, but always being pleasant and cheerful. It was Comanche nature that young men act a bit shy when it came to courting, and Little Wolf was no exception. The only times he was able to approach his beloved was when she was about her duties at the river or helping one of his sisters that she regularly looked after. Today was such a day, and the news he'd just delivered seemed to finally be setting in for the young woman standing stone still in the crystal clear water.

Yeah, it begins with a young Bella, Pale Swan, in love with a young Indian boy Jacob, Little Wolf.

Of course I would never steer your wrong, this is an Edward and Bella love story, but that isn't what is so beautiful about this fic. It's that Beegurl13 picks us up right out of our seat, and carries us back in time. We land right in the middle of the old west, times when the white man were the minority and life was simple, or so it would seem...

The next morning, the small group rode out early. It was nearly a half day journey to the ranch, over several hills and across much open land. Pale Swan clung tightly to Little Wolf as she rode with him on his horse. He had insisted that she did, so that he might protect her from any harm they encountered. During the journey, her hands roamed over his stomach, feeling the taut muscles there. As she laid her face against his back, in the dip between his shoulder blades, Little Wolf sighed and rubbed his hand over hers. Every so often his fingers would graze the bare skin of her thigh, and she felt a tingling in her body that was unfamiliar, but exciting. Wedding preparations were underway, and she waited anxiously for Growling Wolf to proclaim it time for them to be wed. It could not come fast enough for Pale Swan.

When the ranch was finally in view, Pale Swan noticed smoke rising into the air from the chimney in the house. There were animals in the yard, and she could see the dirt in the fields behind the barn had been recently turned over, most likely awaiting the planting of seeds. The group slowed to a stop, watching the settlement for a few minutes before Growling Wolf ordered them to proceed. The sound of horse hooves thumping down on the dry dirt was loud and as they approached the house, the door opened, revealing a rather surprised face before it quickly slammed again.

Here's where it gets interesting and our Pale Swan's meets a white man, Edward Masen and his wife, Kate, who is very much with child. We learn of Edward and Bella's instant attraction and need to stay far away from each other.

Edward remained on the porch, staring off into the distance. He hadn't really acknowledged just how vulnerable he and Kate were on the ranch in the middle of no where, but after the brief meeting, he was beginning to worry. Not only that, but the savages would be back in the space of two days, and the young woman would most likely be with them. He only hoped he could keep his eyes away from her, especially since he got the distinct impression she belonged to the man she rode with. The thing that really worried him was the thrill that shot through his body when, as they were riding away, the girl turned to look at him, letting her eyes unite with his for a few seconds. Edward was a married man, and no good could come from the thoughts running through his mind in regards to this strange, but beautiful girl.

I won't elaborate more. You must understand that Beegurl13 has hit the nail on the head with the dialog and the dialect, the settings are described just right, and the reality of the situations are plausible, all in all – it's absolutely perfect. If you have any respect and admiration for an excellent period fiction, you must give The Maiden a try. You simply must! Tell her Mr. Boody sent ya!

I happened to chase down Beegurl13 and beg her to interview with me, she even offered us here at PIC a special teaser for a future chapter of The Maiden following our talk. She's one busy gal, but here's how our interview went...

Mr. Boody:: Beegurl13, I just want to start off by saying I appreciate you taking time out of your busy day to talk with me. By looking over your profile, you seemed to be quite the busy bee. Get it? Busy Bee?

Beegurl13: Well, I'm just flattered and a little shocked that you'd even want to talk to me. I'm kind of an interview virgin... I hope you'll be gentle with me. And I like the bee reference. Very clever.

MB: Ya know, I'm quite the busy man, I haven’t interviewed anyone in a long time. That should tell you how important you really are.

Bg13:Oh, thanks. *bats eyelashes at Mr. Boody*

MB: *Clears throats and tries very hard not to look at her pretty legs* Explain to me what in the world FAGE is.

Bg13:You would ask me that. I have to look it up myself every time too. :D FAGE stands for FicAwesome Gift Echange. It's through a little group on Facebook called FanFicAholics. Basically, you sign up to write a story based on someone else's prompt. You write a story for someone, and someone writes a story for you. It's really fun. I did it last year & had a great time, so I thought I'd try it again.
Plus the story I wrote last year is one of my favorite things I've written.

MB: So is that where you came up with the story The Maiden?

Bg13:Yep, I got three prompts and the one I chose was Servant and Her Master. I thought about it, remembered a couple of movies I have always loved, and wondered what it would be like if Bella had been raised by an Indian tribe and then met Edward just as she reached adulthood. Plus it meant I got to research the 1800's, and I love history. It’s been fun so far.

MB: Is it your 1st time writing a period piece, because you did an excellent job?

Bg13: Oh, well thank you. You sure know how to make a girl feel good. :) Yeah, it is my first period piece. Like I said, I love history and took several classes in college, and I just love that time - when the west was wild and people were willing to struggle and sacrifice at a chance for a new life. It just really appeals to me. Though I could never live it, I require indoor plumbing and electricity. Plus the Internet and my laptop are pretty freakin' cool. :D

MB: How long have you been a part of the PIC family and what is your favorite thing about it?

Bg13: Well, I started with PIC last year in March, I think, when we had the big relaunch of the site. There are only 3 of the original 7 girls left, and I'm one of them. :D The thing I love most about it is getting to meet so many authors that I love. I've been able to become really good friends with women I normally would have been too star struck to ever talk to, but this job kind of requires it. I love that, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

MB: Do you have an amazing story to tell how you got started in fan fiction?

Bg13: Uhhhh, no. :D I have something all written out in detail on my ff.net profile page, but after thinking about it, I realized that I actually started reading fanfic several years ago, before Twilight ever came around. I found some stories written about the TV show Roswell, and I loved them. I thought it was such an amazing idea to take characters you already know and write new stories with them. I loved it, so when my friend pointed me toward Wide Awake and The Office, I fell head over heels and never looked back. :D

MB: How did you come up with your pen name Beegurl13?

Bg13: It was pretty easy. My name starts with a B, I'm a girl, and my lucky number is 13. (It's a family thing) About 10 years ago, my younger sister was in high school and I saw that she and her friends all had nicknames for each other. They used the first letter of their first name and then attached it to gurl, so her notebook said beegurl, ‘cause her name starts with B, too. I thought it was cute, added the 13 'cause I love it, and that was it. :D I used it in other forums before I started in fan fic, so it's not just a Twilight thing for me.

MB: *adjusts tie and mumbles 'I can't believe she's never been interviewed'* So do you have an all time favorite fic? Like one you think everyone should read?

Bg13: Oh golly, one? :D I don't think I could choose! :D I'd say maybe either River Dam or The Tutor. Or Tropic of Virgo, or maybe Art After 5/Counterpoint. Though Starry Eyed Inside has owned me most recently. And there's always Son of a Preacher Man. And High Anxiety. See, I can't name just one. :D There are WAY too many that I read over and over again. :D Basically anything and everything by ItzMegan73 and sleepyvalentina should be required Twilight FanFic reading. Plain and simple.

MB: In your opinion, what separates a good fanfic from a great fanfic?

Bg13: Hmmmm, that's a good question. I think it just has to appeal to you. I mean, I have friends that go crazy over stories and I'll read them and think "Bleh, nothing great." Yet, I totally fan girl over a different story and other people will say "Oh yeah, it's okay." Everyone is different and has different tastes, which is what makes the fandom so great - there's something for everyone. But in a more broad sense, I think you gotta have good grammar and punctuation. Also, you need to plan out your story line and develop your characters. I really love it when an author writes what they know, or what they love. I think it's better that way, they put more of themselves in it, and it really shows.

MB: I know you have to know about all the drama that seems to constantly taint the fandom. With that being said, if you could change 1 thing about the fanficdom what would it be?

Bg13: One thing... Well, there is a lot of drama, but I don't really get into it much. I'm pretty drama free in real life, so it's not my thing in the fandom. If I could change something, though, it would be the pettiness, I guess. A lot of people seem to want to tear other people down, whether it be fellow authors or people running review sites, or even just readers, and I don't like that. I firmly believe in being kind and nice, and I loath rudeness, so if I could change one thing it would be in regards to that. I've been lucky, though, everyone has been really nice to me, for the most part, so I hope I'm always nice in return.

MB: We've all heard about the biggie fics that are pimped everywhere, do you have a few lesser know fics you adore that need more love?

Bg13: Um, I'd say River Dam because it's on A Different Forest and doesn't have as many readers as I think it should have. :D Other than that, I read a hilarious story called A Simple Kind of Man, and I laughed more than I have in ages. :D It only has 3 chapters so far, but it's so funny. :D If you love a good Redneck Edward, you'll love it. :D

MB: Now lets get back to you.. Which fic of yours are you the most proud of and why?

Bg13: I think the one I'm most proud of is probably the o/s I wrote for FAGE last year, Baby. I was SHOCKED at the response it got. Really, so surprised at how many people read it and the BNA's in the fandom that I'd talk to and they'd say "Oh, you wrote Baby. I read that, it was great!" I was still pretty new at that point and I just wanted to write something smart and interesting, yet with a bit of a twist. I think I did that, and it's still one of my favorite things I've done. That being said, I think all of my stuff is crap and I'm a complete faker. :D I read stuff that other authors write and it's so beautiful and poetic. I'm never going to be like that. I don't even try. :D I just wanna write things that I like and find interesting, and I'm happy with that. But I think Baby might be my favorite...by a hair. :D

MB: Who is your favorite character to write?

Bg13: I love writing Edward. I think, in certain situations, I identify more with Bella and can more easily imagine what she would be feeling, but I do love writing Edward. :D

MB: I may have stalked you a little on Twitter and Facebook. I may have memorized your profile on FFn and I have a few things I want you to clarify...

Bg13: Okay... Should I be filling out paperwork for a restraining order yet?

MB: *no comment* So you like Rob a little right?

Bg13: I like RPattz just a little, yes. Okay, fine...I'm obsessed, whatever.

MB: And angst? It's your favorite thing to read?

Bg13: YES!!! I love angst!!! It makes the HEA at the end SO much better. :D I get bored with fluff, and while I do appreciate a good funny story, I need me some angst. :D Stomach twisting, vomit inducing, kick you in the gut angst. Oh, I love that. :D There's this one chapter in the story High Anxiety, where they are at this club, and Edward is talking to other girls...ugh, it was perfect. :D

MB: I swear, I think I even remember seeing somewhere you begging for someone to write backdoor sex? Is this true? Please, we all want to know. *leans toward Beegurl13 and waits....*

Bg13: Backdoor sex? Oh, you mean buttsecks? :D Heck yes!! :D Yeah, I may have been begging my sweet, wholesome, church going friend EdwardsBloodType to write me some of that. (Stop laughing, Steph...) She did, I preread it, and she has more planned. *squee* And seriously, what's the deal with everyone being so weirded out by that concept? It's like having 2 vag's, you know? It's all good...and it's fun. :D Don't knock it 'til you tried it, right? :P

MB: *fans self*

Bg13: My, are you blushing?

MB: *Coughs and wipes forehead*

Bg13: Well, you play your cards right...

MB: Okay, moving on... Do u read all pairings? Slash? Do you have any hard limits in fic?

Bg13: I don't read vamp or wolf stuff. I can count on one hand the number of vamp stories I've read. I like human stuff. I like to be able to see myself in the story, and last I checked, I didn't have any vamps or wolves living next door to me. I don't mind Slash or Femmeslash, but as long as it's just for the smexy times. If we're talking relationships and love and marriage proposals, I'm all canon. I need Edward with Bella, that's it. But like I said, if it's just smut, I can handle anyone together, other wise I only read all human Edward & Bella stories. :)

MB: Have you ever flounced a fic?

Bg13: Oh yeah, I think everyone has at one point or another. Usually I flounce right at the end, as soon as the major conflict is over and it's smooth sailing until the epi. I can't even tell you how many stories I have yet to read the last 3 or 4 chapters for. Even some written by my friends. Ugh, I suck sometimes. :D

MB: Which Twi book is your favorite? And so far, which movie?

Bg13: Eclipse if my favorite book, though I also LOVE New Moon. And Eclipse was my favorite of the movies, though I'm still heart broken that the Angry Edward scene from the books isn't in it. :( You know the one, when Edward is waiting in Bella's bedroom for her to get back from running off to spend the day with Jacob while Edward was out hunting? Yeah, I loved that scene. I thought it was great because it's the first time that Edward is REALLY mad at Bella, and he just doesn't know how to deal with it. I wanted so badly to see Rob play that part. I think he totally would have nailed the conflicting emotions that are going through Edward's mind. :D Oh well, they didn't ask me to write or direct the movie, so I'll be happy with what we did get. Hello, Leg Hitch!!! :D

MB: I’d already heard through the grapevine that this was going to be your very first interview, so I went through some of the best previously posted interviews and picked out a few questions to throw at you. Are you ready?

Bg13: Okay, hit me...

MB: If you could move to anywhere where would you go?

Bg13: Ummmmm, where is RPattz today? :D Well, aside from next to him, I wanna live in Scotland. I am dying to see what it's like to live in rainy weather and have it green everywhere. That doesn't happen much in the desert. :)

MB: Have you ever sang karaoke?

Bg13: No thank you. Though I was in the high school show choir, so I must not be too bad. At my high school graduation all the seniors were assigned a solo to sing, and I made my bff sing a duet with me instead. She's still my bff, so I guess it was okay. :D I was always more confident dancing around in my little cheerleading skirt than I was singing. Golly, that sounds a little slutty. :D Yep, I guess that’s me. :D

MB: If you were in a beauty pageant, what would your talent be?

Bg13: You know, I won 4th place in the Little Miss Gilbert pageant when I was 4, just saying. :D Um, if I did it now, I guess I'd go with filing my nails (cause I have awesome nails, they're the best thing about me) or swooning over RPattz. I think I'm pretty good at that. :) Getting all speechless and dumb founded, while my eyes glaze over and my heart beats a million thumps a minute... Yeah, I’m great at that, actually. :D

MB: Which Disney Princess most closely resembles you and why?

Bg13: I think...maybe...I don't know. :D There aren't any brown haired, blue eyed princesses, are there? I guess I'd go with Ariel, The Little Mermaid. I was always testing my limits but was never really bad. I just wanted to see what was possible, I suppose. Plus I am, and always have been, boy crazy. :D But my favorite princess is Sleeping Beauty. Seriously, to wake up from sleeping that long and look as hot as she did? That's something to strive for, right there. That's a very admirable quality.

MB: One random strange fact about you?

Bg13: I was kidnapped when I was a baby. Bet you didn't expect that, did you? :D

MB: WHAT? I'm afraid to ask.

Bg13: Yeah, I played this game once, Two Truths and a Lie, and my 3 statements were 1- I was kidnapped as a baby, 2- My family had mob connections, and 3- I was born in Italy. The lie was that I wasn't born in Italy, I'm an Arizona girl through and through. :D No one guessed it right. :D It's a long story. Basically, I was really cute as a baby, and I was really friendly. This girl at church one day decided that she wanted to keep me as her baby, so she took me and left. She had it all planned out as far as where she would live and stuff. About an hour, hour and a half later the police found her. I was happy as always, she said I never even cried. :)

MB: Last but definitely not least, any advice to someone thinking about writing and posting their 1st ff?

Bg13: My advice would be get a beta and pre readers. Seriously, they are such a good course of information and opinions. I couldn't do this without mine. But make sure it's someone that you trust and that 'gets' you. That's what I'd say.

MB: It was truly my pleasure chatting with you today, it's not often that I get the opportunity to sit down with beautiful lady and spend my afternoon.

Bg13: Oh, well aren’t you just about the sweetest thing I’ve seen all day? I should thank you, too, for being so gentle with me. This wasn’t nearly as painful as I feared. I’m sure there are several authors out there who can’t say the same thing about me and how gentle I was with them... :D


As promised, here is our super-dee-duper-extra-special teaser for chapter 6 of The Maiden that will post tomorrow!

He was quiet as he stood next to the table, most likely waiting for Dr. Cullen. Pale Swan nervously smoothed her skirt and looked up to him, waiting until their eyes met. “Have you met any nice girls yet?” I asked.

His eyes seemed to spark at the question. “Um, no, not really. Why?”

“I thought, if you like, we could eat lunch one day.” Pale Swan let her eyes fall to the table, suddenly very interested in the wood grain pattern in one of the boards. She didn't really want to be with Michael, but he was nice and kind, and she needed some new options. She knew she didn't want to live alone for the rest of her life, and she wanted a family of her own someday. Pale Swan had to at least make an effort, and she knew he was interested.

His face lit up, but he quickly tried to hide his excitement. “Um, yeah, sure. We could do that. Maybe a picnic on Sunday would be good. I could come get you, maybe go to the creek nearby.”

She forced a smile on her face and nodded. “Yes, Sunday will be good.”